A New Phase
by Karma1987
Summary: Post Season 7, With Rory off on the campaign trail Lorelai and Emily enter a new phase of their relationship.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: The characters belong to the rightful owners. As usual just borrowing them.

Cue taken from Rory's comment in Gilmore Girls Only about how Lorelai and Emily would get on once she left.

 **A New Phase**

 **1**

Gulping the last of her now tepid coffee Lorelai pushed the brass doorbell of her parents' house and sighed heavily. Friday night dinner without Rory, it was a disaster waiting to happen, but…. She lost her train of thought as the door was yanked open the moment the bell finished ringing.

"Oh it's you," Emily looked flustered as she peered past Lorelai to the immaculate driveway.

Lorelai stopped herself from rolling her eyes. A flustered Emily was never a good sign. "You were expecting someone else?"

"No, well…" Emily waved her in, closing the door behind her. "Yes…" Emily looked her up and down "Hello. Thank you for not wearing jeans."

Lorelai blinked back surprise, her mother was trying to joke with her. "You…" her mother held up her hand her head leaning forward as she discerned some barely perceptible noise from outside.

"That's them," Emily threw open the door and practically bolted out of the door.

Lorelai's mouth dropped in confusion and she moved to the door to watch what the hell was going on with her mother. _Them_ , turned out to be a small beaten up blue hatchback. Her mother was blocking her view of the driver, but for the life of her Lorelai couldn't fathom who her mother knew who would own such a car. She watched as her mother took a step back allowing the car to drive away before casting a look down at the ground to see if there was any damage to the concrete. Emily turned and scurried back towards the house clutching a white bag covered in an image of a gazebo and the words China Garden.

"I'm not sure that car is road worthy," Emily muttered as she reached the door her path blocked by Lorelai who was staring at her mother with complete confusion. "Lorelai! Will you let me enter my own house please?"

"You ordered Chinese food," Lorelai blurted taking a step backwards so her mother could enter. "You ordered Chinese food?" she repeated

"You like Chinese food," Emily retorted, her voice rising dangerously

"I know I like Chinese food," Lorelai followed her mother as Emily moved further into the house. "Do you like Chinese food?"

"Yes I do," Emily stopped outside the dining room and turned to face her daughter. "Your father is having a dinner at Yale, it's some faculty function, so I thought we could be a bit spontaneous."

"Spontaneous…?!" Lorelai managed to mutter before having to close her eyes to process what was going on. "You ordered Chinese food, have you had an…" She opened her eyes and instantly felt awful at her incredulity. Her mother's eyes had narrowed and had darkened with annoyance, the eyebrows were raising, while her mouth had thinned slightly, her face going rigid. Lorelai gulped, the evening was about to descend south from crazy into argument. "I love Chinese food Mom, I'm just really surprised. We've _never_ had take out before."

"I thought you might like a treat given that…" Emily voice trailed off to just above a whisper.

"Have you spoken to her?" Lorelai took the cue, Rory was a safe subject.

Emily's face softened, "Yesterday. She sounded tired but she's having a wonderful time."

"It's a great opportunity for her," Lorelai smiled at the pride she heard in her mother's voice. "Er Mom?" Lorelai stared at the unset dining table. "Where are we eating?"

"On the patio," Emily gestured towards the open doors at the rear of the house. "The weather is lovely and well…"

"We're being spontaneous," Lorelai finished. "So patio."

"Patio," Emily nodded, her demeanour relaxing.

Together they moved out onto the patio, the air was warm, the little courtyard warmed from the still present sun and the large patio heaters.

"It looks great Mom," Lorelai sank into one of the seats and studied the ornate place setting, a gold leafed soup bowl set on linen placemat, a spoon, fork and chop sticks set beside. In the centre of the table was a glass top lazy-susan, 3 tealight candles in a crystal holder in the centre. Behind the revolving circular glass there were two jugs containing clear liquids, one of which Lorelai hoped was a premixed cocktail.

Emily smiled warmly as she set about pulling the cardboard boxes from the bag, setting them on the lazy susan so they could be easily shared. "I ordered something from each section. I wasn't sure what you like."

"Sounds great," Lorelai smiled. It seemed the right thing to do, despite the fact that she was completely baffled by her mother's behaviour. "So, have you ever had take out before?"

Emily sat down and gave a heavy sigh of what sounded like nervousness and anticipation. "Never like this. I just thought you might… I know it's…" she looked awkwardly at her plate. "How are you feeling?"

Lorelai held her breath and nodded softly, the craziness was her mother's way of trying to ease Rory leaving. "I keep pretending she's still at Yale, and then she calls and I remember she's not. It's dumb," Lorelai reached for a carton, using it as an excuse to collect her thoughts. "Everything reminds me of her and I keep remembering things that I haven't thought about in years. It's stupid she hasn't lived properly with me for 4 years. But I dunno I guess it's just me missing her" she opened the carton and peered inside.

"I had the same thing, you were everywhere but you were gone."

Lorelai looked up at her mother's small horribly fragile sounding voice. The woman in front of her didn't look like prim proper upright Emily Gilmore, the woman in front of her was slightly hunched and looked old and frightened. Lorelai panicked and her brain went to _diffuse tension with humour mode_ "Must have been some kind of PTSD flashback kind of thing for you."

It was the wrong thing to say.

Emily's face dropped. "I have wonderful memories of you Lorelai," Emily told her softly and she carefully folded the napkin on her lap. Her attention focused down so not to make eye contact.

"That's…" Lorelai picked up the next carton, trying to think of something to say that wasn't going to make her mother cry or flip out. "From when I was little?"

"From your whole life," Emily gave her a watery smile.

Lorelai made a scoffing sound. "Even when I was a teenager and in the running for the demon daughter award?"

"Yes, even then," Emily finally reached for a carton. "A lot of them are little moments, things I don't think you realised I saw, but there are a few when we engaged in conversation. It wasn't all yelling."

Lorelai's shoulders sagged, all she really remembered from being a teenager was being in a near constant argument with her mother, the feeling of anger brought about by being constantly misunderstood and unheard and the crushing sense that she was a disappointment. "I don't…what are they?" She closed her eyes in annoyance at herself, _danger danger Will Robinson_ , played in her mind.

Emily used the act of spooning rice on her plate to give her time. "My 40th birthday, I came downstairs and you were already up and dressed and beside my seat was this little box with a big silver bow, and you looked at me so worried, so anxious and begged me to open your gift," Emily face fell into a nostalgic smile as she reminisced. "You bought me a glass rose and you were so worried that I already had one. When I told you no and that I loved it, you leapt up and threw your arms around me, gave me this great big hug and kissed me." Emily sighed slightly "We had barely spoken for the 3 weeks prior and I don't think we'd embraced like that for over 2 years and well…" Emily trailed off.

Lorelai took a sharp intake of breath, she vaguely remembered what her mother was talking about, some tiny blip of peace 24 years ago. She wondered if she had actually embraced her mother like that since. "I sort of remember."

"It was a long time ago," Emily told her, her voice was low, soft, "perspective makes things be remembered differently by different people I think. My favourite memory of you as a teenager was just before Rory was born."

Lorelai nearly choked on a mouthful. "Your favourite memory of me as a teenager was from when I was pregnant!"

Emily nodded softly, "Yes, I was bringing you back from your 36 week doctor's appointment, you just looked so miserable. You'd been cooped up in the house for over a month and I just couldn't bring myself to take you home just yet, so I turned right instead of left. You looked at me like I was mad when I pulled up in front of the baby store and made some remark about how I had already bought the entire store and…"

"Ducks," Lorelai blurted, "You said I needed a theme and I chose ducks."

Emily's face broke into a beaming smile as she realised Lorelai remembered, "We bought everything in that store that had a duck on in it, and as we were going back to the car you grabbed my arm and you looked so panicked I thought you'd gone into labor."

"I needed the bathroom," Lorelai shook her head in disbelief as the memory came back to her.

"There was a bakery with a café just down the street so we went in," Emily put down her cutlery and her hand inched towards Lorelai a fraction before she pulled them from the table and folded them in her lap. "You told me I couldn't have coffee because you couldn't, so I got us tea and I bought you a slice of cake because I thought…Well I don't know what I thought." She shrugged and continued her reminiscing. "When you came back from the restroom you stared at the cake like it was some great mystery, then marched up to the counter got another fork and came back and thrust it at me. You were annoyed because you wouldn't be able to eat the whole piece because the baby took up too much room." Emily returned to her plate, "I told you you'd done the same."

"I remember," Lorelai sat forward. "We talked about being really pregnant, how sometimes it sucked," she frowned, she felt annoyed and wasn't sure if she was feeling annoyed at herself for not remembering the clearly close moment she had shared with her mother or angry that there hadn't been more like it. It had been a moment when her mom had been like a friend, not her mother, it had been a moment like her own relationship Rory. "You told me you got stuck, was it the pool? No, the bath tub."

"Both," Emily rolled her eyes.

"How did you get stuck?" Lorelai picked up one of the half empty carton's and spooned a portion onto her plate.

"In the pool, I couldn't climb up the ladder, you were in the way. Your father had to come in the pool and push me out." Emily blushed, "and the bathtub, well, I probably could have done it in the end, but I was a week overdue and I just couldn't get into a position to pull myself to standing. I think I thought I would slip, your father rescued me again and then sat with me while I had a meltdown about how I was the size of a hippo and that you were never coming out, and he told me I wasn't and…" Emily trailed off. "You came the next day." she finished softly.

"The two things are connected?" Lorelai looked up from her plate and grimaced as she realised what her mother was saying. "Oh…Mom! Oh gross, mental picture I really didn't need?!" Emily blushed beet red. Lorelai shook her head trying to clear her mind from the unwanted image. Taking a cleansing breath she tried to continue the nice moment she was having with her mother. "That was a good afternoon, the bakery."

"It was, it was good between us for a couple of weeks," Emily agreed taking a white prawn cracker and placing it on the sauce that had accumulated in the base of the bowl. "I mean don't get me wrong, you were miserable, grumpy and snappy but it was all about being heavily pregnant,"

Lorelai glanced across at her mother and saw the end of the sentence, the _it wasn't my fault_ had been left unsaid. She stopped herself from rolling her eyes. If her mother could force herself not to finish her thought she could do that. Everything about tonight was reeking of effort on her mother's behalf, she owed Emily to at least try just as hard. "What happened after that, I mean it sounded like we…" she paused as it hit her, the argument that had happened 3 days before Rory had been born. The argument that had led her to not tell her parents she was in labor and had meant she had taken herself off to the hospital and just leaving them a note. "The dinner with the Haydens."

Emily sighed heavily and crushed the soaked cracker with her spoon flattening it into the porcelain. "That was an awful night, and after that you would barely look at me, and if you did look at me it was…it was" she sighed again but it sounded more like she was trying to prevent herself crying. "I bought ice cream," pushing her seat back and almost running from the table. "I'll get it, Rory said…"

What Rory said was left untold as Lorelai watched her mother practically run from her, setting her cutlery down she slouched into her chair and folded her arms around her. She didn't like to think about that time, it all hurt too much, and she had always blamed them but when she really thought about it, half the reason her relationship with her mother was so bad was because of her own actions. During her pregnancy once they got past the inevitable arguments the situation had wrought, her mother had tried so hard, and she had just ignored her, or pushed her away or when she couldn't do that just yelled. Lorelai grimaced, she'd accused her mother of never caring about her once, but so much of Emily's actions in the past that she had taken as just her mother trying to control her or butting in where she wasn't wanted was her mother caring. If Emily hadn't cared she wouldn't have bothered. So much of this awful cycle that they got into was because Emily cared. Lorelai exhaled sharply, tonight was not the night for this. She and Emily needed a buffer, they were in dangerous territory. She sat thinking about how to bring the conversation to something far more comfortable for both of them. After a couple of minutes she looked over her shoulder towards the door. It was taking too long to get ice cream. Slowly Lorelai stood and crossed the patio, slipping inside the house she took a few steeling breathes and entered into the kitchen.

Her mother was stood staring intently at the pattern of the counter top, her hands gripping the edge. Lorelai exhaled slowly before walking further in, when the sound of her shoes didn't seem to alert her mother to her presence she moved so she was standing opposite Emily, the island between them. A tub of Rocky road ice cream was on the counter and two spoons beside a legal pad that bore her mother's neat handwriting. Lorelai read it and took a sharp intake of breath. It was a list of the food they had just ate and instructions on ice-cream flavours with the words _eat out of the carton_ , underlined, circled and with multiple exclamation points. Rory said. Her mother hadn't just got one of each section, she had asked her granddaughter. She had wasted time from her probably no more than five minutes of speaking time with her granddaughter on what food to order. "Mom," Emily seemed to vibrate slightly before looking up. The mask was in place. "We should watch a movie" Her mother looked as shocked as Lorelai felt about the words that had just come out of her mouth. Lorelai lunged for the ice cream, desperately trying to think of a way to cover her faux pas "We should take this outside It's better when it's melty. Yeah it goes all soft and then I dunno it tastes better" Lorelai panicked hoping that Emily hadn't noticed the massive mistake that had just fallen out of her mouth.

"You want to watch a movie? Now? Do you mean one of those movies that you bought me?" Emily asked her slowly. Lorelai forced herself to smile and nodded, uncertain what to do. Emily stood straighter "We only have a DVD player in the bedroom. We have to eat the ice cream"

With nowhere to run Lorelai turned to the safety of humour. "I can sit on a trash bag, if you're worried that I'll spill. But I assure you Mom I am very good at getting food in my mouth. I've been eating on my own for years, it's one of my specialist skills in fact," Lorelai grinned at her mother. "You bought the good kind of Rocky Road" she studied the ice cream carton.

Emily tipped her head to one side and stared at Lorelai in confusion "You want to watch a movie and eat ice cream in my bedroom?"

Lorelai mirrored her mother's head tipping and smiled uneasily "Sure…"

"You really want to do this?" Emily rounded the island to stand beside Lorelai. Her eyes were wide, hopeful.

"Yes" Lorelai cringed internally,

"But…" Emily hesitated, Lorelai sighed, she knew that _but…_ , it was a way out. Miss Manners was giving her a pass. "Eating in the bedroom? Why watch a movie?"

"We had fun in North Carolina doing it. Maybe it's something we could do together when Dad isn't here, like our thing and maybe when Rory can get home it could be something that we could do together, the three of us…" she trailed off as Emily shook her head, silently thanking her mother for saying no. She sighed and shook her own head in an attempt to reengage her brain.

"I would love to watch a movie with you Lorelai but I can't eat in the bedroom." Emily sighed sadly "It's just not done."

"Ok," Lorelai sighed "It's not done. It was just an idea" She felt relieved.

"Next time your father is not here on a Friday night I want to do movie night." Emily stated slowly. "I will get the DVD player moved and we will make a night of it." Lorelai couldn't help herself at smile by the excited expression on her mother's face. "Our thing," Emily's shoulders scrunched upwards with delight. "How wonderful, our thing."

Before Lorelai realised what she was doing she had leaned forward and kissed her mother on the cheek. She stepped back in surprise, her mother doing the same. The two women stared at each other for a moment neither of them wanting to be the first to react, neither of them wanting to chance that they would say something wrong and ruin the most unusual of moments they were sharing. Finally Emily moved and took her Lorelai's hand into hers and squeezed it tight.

"Ok, so actually happening and not some kinda twilight zone thing," Lorelai smiled awkwardly and let go of her mother's hand. "We should eat the ice cream before it gets too melty" She shook her head slightly, wondering when she had the head injury that made her brain come up with the scenario of having a thing with her mother. Movie night with Emily Gilmore sounds like a barrel of laughs, an epic comedy of errors. She sighed, it hadn't happened yet, maybe it wouldn't. She just had to remember that the next time she saw her mother to have her brain properly installed.


	2. Chapter 2

An - The reviews aren't working properly and I can't reply individually, thank you for reviewing and I'm glad you like it. This started off as a 2 shot and I'm now on chapter 7, which always seems to be the way when you trying to write something else. But anyway, enjoy movie night. x

 **2**

"Explain why I am doing this again?" Lorelai sighed heavily.

The hands free kit crackled for a moment before her daughter's far too happy voice sounded into the cab of the jeep. "You made an offer to Grandma and Grandpa is away and she wants to spend time with you, doing _your thing_. The thing _you_ suggested that you could share."

"It's watching a movie after dinner," Lorelai groaned. "Why did I think extending Friday night dinner was a good idea? This is why I need you babe, my brain goes mush and I end up doing crazy things, especially when confronted with your pod grandma, which was your fault by the way, you should have warned me what she was doing," she scowled as Rory chuckled down the phone. "Hey, I want your pity not your mirth. Be nice to Mommy."

"Be nice to Grandma." Rory retorted. "She's your Mommy."

"Low blow kid," Lorelai turned into her parent's immaculate driveway. "It is going to be a disaster, even worse than the Rocky road incident, you should have seen her face when it fell off the spoon. Thank god it landed on her pant leg. If it had got her blouse I think I would have been literally dead." Lorelai brought her jeep to a halt. "I thought she was going to combust," she shuddered as the memory from 3 weeks ago played in surround sound in her mind.

"I was the one who told her you had to eat out of the carton, how can she blame you for that," Rory chuckled.

Lorelai scoffed, "you have met my mother, right? Anything can be made my fault."

"It will be fine Mom, I picked great movies and I know Grandma is looking forward to it." The phone line crackled, " _Really_ looking forward to it."

"Quit guilt tripping me," Lorelai checked her appearance in the visor mirror. "Well it's time. She's probably clocked me already. You're sure you're good and you don't need anything?"

"Mom, the unexpected care package was more than enough. I really appreciate it," Rory gave a sad soft sigh. "Thank everyone for me please."

"You got it babe. Love you, speak to you later OK" Lorelai sighed heavily as her daughter bid her goodbye and slowly set about getting out of the car using the time to mentally prepare herself for an evening alone with her mother. The door opened almost as soon as the doorbell rang and Lorelai blinked in surprise. "Mom?"

"Hello Lorelai," Emily greeted her with a wide smile, stepping back to allow her in.

Lorelai held back the retort that was on her tongue about her mother waiting at the door for her. "Hi Mom, sorry I'm a bit late, I was talking to Rory."

"How is she?" Emily looked nervous for a moment.

"Oh yeah she's great," Lorelai assured her. "We managed to get a care package to her via one of Lane's Mom's church contacts at the hall she's at, she was just calling to say thanks."

"A care package?" Emily's eyebrows raised.

"Pop tarts, couple legal pads" Lorelai answered quickly, sensing the cold front from her mother over not being included in the care package. "Just silly bits. We're gonna work with Mrs Kim to get Rory some proper boxes. She's going to be at several church venues. So If you want to include anything," she sighed inwardly as Emily's eyebrows lowered. "Nothing breakable or heavy."

"I'll have a think; maybe a nice sweater," Emily mused. "Or a travel pillow for the bus, she said her neck was sore," Emily lead them to the dining room.

"Sounds great Mom," Lorelai followed her mother, casting a hopeful look towards the living room as her mother took her down the centre of the house towards the dining room, "no drinks?"

"No," Emily looked towards the cart in the corner, "it doesn't really fit with the schedule."

"Schedule?" Lorelai asked nervously. Her mother and schedules meant structure and order, not fun, but then an absence of fun had been a given from the moment she had suggested this stupid idea 3 weeks ago.

"Well, Rory picked 2 movies, if we eat now we might be able to watch both," Emily looked at her hopefully. "There is wine with the salad."

"Well as long as there is wine," Lorelai slumped into her seat and reached for a roll. "Wait, salad? I don't get it with the rest of dinner?"

"Rory suggested we have one course so we have more time." Emily started to move towards the kitchen.

"So you chose to keep the salad part?" Lorelai stared at her mother incredulously.

Emily didn't give her a response instead moving into the kitchen. Lorelai rolled her eyes and slumped backwards into her chair, this was going to be a long night.

"Sit up straight Lorelai," Emily chastised her grown up daughter as she returned from the kitchen with two plates in her hand. "I gave the maid the night off," Emily explained at Lorelai's surprised look, "warm chicken and chorizo salad," she set the plate in front of Lorelai. "Would you like dressing?"

"Did you make this?" Lorelai looked nervously at the brightly coloured and elegantly plated salad.

"The maid prepared, I assembled," Emily told her triumphantly as she sat down. "Now eat up."

The meal passed quickly, her mother taking lead to provide her with a download of her week, before Lorelai offered some information about happenings at the inn and a few random tit bits about Stars Hollow goings on, but nothing further; trailing off she turned her attention back to her salad. Feeling her mother's eyes on her she looked up. "What?"

"Is there anything else?" Emily asked.

"Nope," Lorelai shook her head, "the salad was great Mom."

"I'm glad you enjoyed it," Emily sighed in a way that hinted at disappointment as she stood up and reached for the now empty plates. "I'll get these out of the way and then we shall go upstairs for our movie night."

When her mother returned from the kitchen Lorelai followed her up the flights of stairs to the top of the house were the rarely used Den was located. Emily opened the door with a flourish and ushered Lorelai inside allowing Lorelai to have a quick scan of the room. Yes; her mother had definitely been looking forward to tonight. It looked like Emily had replaced all the soft furnishings within the room, had the couch reupholstered and brought a brand new TV which the DVD player that Lorelai had bought her mother 5 years earlier was now connected to. Set on the wooden coffee table were 2 bowls and neatly placed out a wide selection of candy.

"Sit, sit," Emily commanded moving towards the couch and sitting down with a flourish. "Now Rory suggested that I get these brands, I didn't know which ones you would want to eat so I got them all. Now just choose…"

"They're all good," Lorelai sank into the couch and scanned the candy on offer. "It's what we usually have on a movie night."

"What?!" Emily looked back and forth between Lorelai and the candy. "We can't possibly eat all this in one sitting."

"Well, yeah probably not, Rory went with what we would usually have," Lorelai reasoned.

"Lorelai!" Emily's mouth dropped open. "How on earth do you stay so slim?"

Lorelai shrugged, "Dunno, never been a problem, maybe the coffee counteracts, burns it off or something."

"Unbelievable," Emily shook her head in disbelief "Well, you just wait, I can feel myself putting on weight just looking at all this"

"Nonsense, you look great Mom."

Emily shuffled awkwardly in her seat "Well thank you. So which movie do you want to watch first?"

Lorelai looked at the two DVD's on offer and smiled. Rory had gone classic and safe, sticking to films that she knew her grandmother would like. _The King and I_ and the Judy version of _a Star is Born._ "Either is great Mom, which do you want to watch?"

"Well," Emily studied the covers. "I think the King and I, I haven't seen that in years."

"Alrighty then," Lorelai grabbed the case and set about getting the movie started. With the warnings and logos rolling she sank back into the couch and began to open boxes of candy, expertly sharing them between the bowls.

"Not so much," Emily grabbed her arm.

"Oh Mom, no such thing," Lorelai stopped pouring into her mother's bowl all the same and held it out to her. "So the rules of movie night. Get situated now, no fidgeting once we start. No talking during the movie, if you have to go to the bathroom, we don't stop the film because it spoils the flow. No phone calls…"

"Your father may ring," Emily interrupted.

"Ok, if Dad rings we'll pause it," Lorelai conceded. "Same if Rory calls,"

"Alright," Emily nodded in acceptance.

Lorelai grabbed her candy bowl and sank back into the couch. She resisted the urge to put her feet up onto the table or couch and instead slumped down into the soft cushions. She stifled a laugh as her mother stiffly copied her, the shorter woman looking completely uncomfortable. "Ready Mom?" On her mother's nod she started the movie and started to eat her candy dessert.

As the movie played Lorelai kept glancing across at Emily, her mother had sat up slightly in to what was a more comfortable position for her and was watching wide eyed, thoroughly engrossed, a wide smile across her face. Eventually Emily realised she was being watched and bristled slightly, her shoulders tensing. "I just like to watch people's reaction to the bits I like" Lorelai told her quickly.

"Do I pass muster?" Emily fixed her daughter with a serious stare. Her shoulders relaxed as Lorelai nodded. "Good," Emily sank back down into the couch and resumed intently watching the screen.

After another 20 minutes of silence as the movie rolled the house phone rang.

"That Dad?" Lorelai asked as her mother rose from the couch to take the call. She paused the movie and set about refilling her candy bowl. As she did she looked around the room taking in the new brightly coloured cushions and throws, the furnishings were more like something she would have chosen as opposed to her mother's taste. Directing her attention further then the couch she took in the room as a whole and frowned. Folding her arms across her chest Lorelai studied the rest of the room.

"Your father said hello," Emily told her cheerfully as she re-entered the room. She paused as she took in her daughter's annoyed expression. "We agreed that I could speak with him."

"We did," Lorelai nodded.

"So what is it?" Emily's voice was tight. "I must have done something to get that look."

"It's nothing," Lorelai shrugged.

"It's not nothing. Out with it," Emily strode across to the armchair and sat down so that she was facing Lorelai with her legs crossed and her hands clasped in her lap. "I want to know what I've done wrong, right now! Else it will stew and you will throw it at me in 10 years time."

Lorelai rolled her eyes. "I was just wondering why all the photos of Rory and me are in the room you never use."

Emily's expression dropped from one that had been ready for battle to one of surprise, "Oh,"

"I mean me I get, but why hide Rory away," Lorelai scowled deeper. "You like Rory, you're proud of Rory."

"Photographs are frozen memories Lorelai," Emily told her softly. "They provoke emotional responses and promote questions from others. When the memory is painful or not yours, being asked a question about it can be uncomfortable" Emily sighed heavily "I'm not hiding them away, I have them out and on display and my favourite photos are in our bedroom. I just don't like to share them, it's perhaps a little selfish and silly. But that's just how it is."

Lorelai relaxed her stance, the creeping sense of guilt that she seemed to carry around with her when dealing with her mother weighing down on her shoulders. The feeling that made her always need to do something…She stood up and crossed to the doorway

"Lorelai?" Emily's brow knitted together in confusion. "Where are you going?"

"Your room, I want to see your favourite photos," Lorelai called over her shoulder as she left the den.

"You've been in the bedroom before, there is absolutely no need to act like this," Emily called after her incredulously as she rose from the armchair.

"Well, I've never looked that closely at your bedroom." Lorelai moved through the hallway. "I mean, I don't know what you and Dad are into, I don't want to see anything that could scar me for life."

"Lorelai!" Emily followed her daughter as Lorelai bounded down the stairs.

"I mean you guys could be into anything."

"Your father and I…I am not having this discussion with you." she admonished as Lorelai threw open the door to the master bedroom. "Be careful!"

Lorelai stared at the shelves that covered the room. On the book laden shelves near the door she could see her parents wedding photos from their wedding and vow renewal, along with a picture of them dancing together at some fancy event from what looked like the 80's given her mother's shoulder pads. Tucked on the bottom shelf was a picture of her mother sat leaning against her father at some function. Her father's hand was on her mother's pregnant stomach, both of them were smiling as they watched whatever was happening in front of them. Lorelai picked up the frame and stared at it. Her parents looked so young and happy, stylish in an on trend way. She never thought of her parents as young, or trendy, they had always seemed older, stuffy and whilst always stylish and elegant never a follower of popular trends.

"That was a friend's wedding, about 2 months before you arrived. My friend Sweetie took it when we weren't paying attention," Emily provided her context, "photography was one of her hobbies."

"I thought it wasn't proper to be seen out at these things when you were pregnant," Lorelai muttered, her anger was waning at her mother and she was now completely unsure of what she was supposed to do.

"Not usually," Emily took the frame from Lorelai's hands, "but weddings were always the exception. Your first photo is over there," Emily replaced the frame in its position and pointed to the next set of shelving.

Lorelai followed her mother and stared at the grey and white snap. It was a photograph of her mother holding her as a tiny brand new baby. Her mother looked a mess, dishevelled and exhausted but unbelievably happy. "You let Dad take a picture of you looking like that?"

"I hardly even noticed he was there. You were half an hour old and you were all my world consisted of," Emily told Lorelai quietly, her arms wrapped around her middle like she was hugging herself.

"I thought I burned all the pictures of me," Lorelai looked away from her mother. They were crossing into dangerous territory, the last time they had gone down memory lane movie night had been established.

"You burned all the albums, with all the negatives in the back. I only have the ones that were in frames," Emily pointed further down the shelves. "Another selfish moment, I didn't want Rory to lose or damage the only photographs I have of you as a young child. I know she wouldn't have but I couldn't…" Emily trailed off and pointed once more "These are all we have"

Lorelai eyes scanned the shelves, there were 4 other frames, the first contained the photo from her graduation at the community college, but the other 3 were of her as a child, one a picture of her sat on her father's knee when she was probably 2 years old, both their attention on an ornate leather-bound book. Another of her at about 4 years old waving a pompom, wearing Yale colours, a big toothy grin on her face. The final picture was from when she at about 18 months old, sat in the snow on the patio, bundled up in a thick snowsuit and a red woolly hat; toddler her was looking at a young and happy Emily who was crouched beside her, both of them laughing in delight as they played with the snow. Lorelai exhaled slowly, she wasn't sure what she was supposed to do or say. The photos were beautiful moments from her childhood that she had no memory of. Photos that were clearly treasured by her parents. The silence was deafening and it was finally broken by her mother awkwardly clearing her throat.

"There is a similar one of Rory and your father," Emily pointed at the last shelving unit.

Lorelai moved numbly, her feet moving without her thinking. These shelves were clearly dedicated to Rory, her school photos, other moments that Rory and her grandparents had shared. The photo Emily directed her to, was adorable; Rory couldn't have been more the 6 months old, and was sat on her grandfather's knee as he read the financial paper to her. "It's a great photo Mom," Lorelai blinked back tears. She looked down and another photo caught her eye. She picked up the silver frame and stared. It was a picture of her sat on the floor in the dark, Rory as a tiny baby tucked in her arm, both of them staring up at the illuminated Christmas tree. The fire was behind them casting a shadow. If it wasn't for the fact that the picture seemed to be taken from a slightly crooked angle and was slightly out of focus it almost looked like a hallmark card. It was something that one of her parents must have taken in secret.

"That's my favourite," Emily told her softly as she took the frame from Lorelai's hands and stared at it wistfully before tenderly touching the glass and setting it back in its place. Lorelai wondered how often her mother had done that action before. "We should get back to the movie," Emily straightened, her voice steeled.

Lorelai blinked. The moment had passed; whatever it was, it was gone. She followed her mother blindly up the stairs. "Mom?" she paused in the doorway.

"The movie Lorelai,"

"I know," Lorelai crossed to the couch and sat down. "Mom?"

Emily stared intently at the remote as she tried to make the movie play, "No talking."

"Could you make me copies?" Lorelai asked. Emily's head whipped round so quickly it looked to Lorelai like it would spin off her neck. "The baby ones of me and Rory. With Dad and the one with the snow."

"Alright," Emily nodded her head stiffly.

"Cool," Lorelai sunk into the soft couch. "Now get going, need to see those dresses swirl."

Emily complied; finally hitting the right button to make the movie resume and then sank back into the couch. After a few minutes Lorelai turned her head slightly to watch her mother. It looked like there were a few tears on Emily's cheek, she was pretty sure they weren't caused by the movie. To say something would embarrass her mother, which would cause a fight, so she sank back into the couch and did nothing. They weren't there yet.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you everyone who's reading and for those who have reviewed. Originally this started as a 2 chapter story and it's grown from there. Hope you enjoy the next part.**

3

Lorelai reached over her shoulder to pull the blanket from the back of the couch to cover her legs; September was turning cold especially at night. It was the third movie night she had had with her mother and surprisingly she was actually enjoying them. It was an incredibly safe way to spend time with her mother in that there was no talking, and the topic of conversation when she made her escape from the house at the end of the night was restricted to discussion of what they had just watched and _drive safe_. Her mother had actually asked for this movie night in her indirect way; going on that Richard was going to be around every Friday until the holidays and then it was the holiday rush and he was going to be away this night and she wasn't sure when he would be going away again. Agreeing to come over on a Wednesday night to watch a movie was easier than an argument and it was strangely nice to be wanted by her mother. Luke had teased her about setting a precedence but a happy Emily was a happy everyone.

She looked into at her bag as her cell rang "It's Rory," she told Emily as she recognised her daughter's number and answered the call, "Hey."  
"Are you at Grandma's?" her daughters voice sounded impatient.  
Lorelai rolled her eyes, "Hello daughter dearest, why yes I am currently seated resplendent at your Grandmother's surveying a moving pict..."  
Rory gave a huff as she interrupted, "Why aren't you opening the door then?"  
"What..." Lorelai sat up straight, "No! You're not…" she gave a delighted squeal as she kicked off the blanket and ran out of the room. Once through the door she could make out the sound of the doorbell being rung repeatedly. In the background she could hear her mother calling after her, asking what was going on and if Rory was ok. Moving down the 2 flights of stairs at a dangerous speed Lorelai heard her daughter laugh down the phone. "This better be you," Lorelai threw open the heavy wooden door. "It's you!" She cried in delight and wrapped her arms round Rory as tightly as she could. It was the first time she had seen her daughter since Rory had left, no amount of phone calls made up for not being able to see her. "You're here, how are you here?" Lorelai held Rory away from her to study her. Her daughter looked older, her clothes rumpled, her hair mussed up, her eyes weighed by a sheen of tiredness, but she was still her Rory.

"Rory?" Emily called with delighted surprise as she joined them in the foyer.

"Grandma!" Rory shrugged out of Lorelai's grip so she could hug her grandmother tightly.

"Did you know she was coming?" Lorelai asked Emily,

Rory shook her head as she stepped out of her grandmother's embrace. Her hand stayed on her grandmother's forearm, like she was using Emily to steady herself. "I didn't know myself until lunchtime. The event we were supposed to be covering was cancelled and the next one isn't till Friday, so we have a free night" Rory told them breathily, the words tumbling from her mouth in excitement. "James one of the other reporters, he's from Boston, it's his dad's 70th birthday and he wanted to get back for it and he knew how much I was missing you and he offered me a lift. It's a complete flying visit he has to pick me up at 9.30 tomorrow so we can get back to the bus in time."

"James is in my will," Lorelai grinned, "which one is he?"

"The one who is convinced Rory is short for Aurora," Rory wrinkled her nose in distaste. "But I had to come and he dropped me at home and you weren't there so I called the inn and Michel said something cryptic about you not being there so I figured you must be at Luke's for food and when I got there he said you were here but Lane was there and she went and got the twins," Rory gave her mother a beaming smile, "they are so big Mom. And cute. And then I came here." She took a big breath, "Luke said movie night. Does that mean Grandpa isn't here?"

"He's gets back late tomorrow night," Emily told her softly, holding still as she let Rory cling onto her.

Rory frowned and shook her head in distress, "I can't believe I missed him! I don't know when I'm going to get back to see you guys."

"We'll call him," Lorelai assured her. She caught Emily's eye a look of silent concern passing between them over Rory's slightly panicked state, "have you eaten?"

"Luke made me a cheeseburger," Rory told her, "and its movie night right so there's candy. Come on let's go," she started towards to staircase. "I want to see the den Grandma, Mom said you got new pillows and stuff."

"I gave it a bit of a spruce," Emily answered, as Lorelai started after her daughter Emily caught Lorelai's elbow making her stop so she could mouth _is she ok?_.

"I think she's just tired," Lorelai whispered. "Come on." They followed Rory up to the top of the house, watching her carefully. "I wished I'd known you were coming babes I would have got you a proper birthday present," Lorelai came alongside her.

Rory looked at her, "I don't need anything, just being here, just being home," she entered the den and cast a look around as she made her way to the couch, dropping into the squishy cushions and finding a comfortable position, "it's great Grandma."

"Thank you Rory," Emily hesitated at the door.

"Grandma sit," Rory patted the seat beside her.

"Just a moment," Emily turned and left the room.

Rory cast a confused look at her mother before nestling into Lorelai's side. "It's so good to be home, it just smells of home."

"er kid, don't scare Mommy, this isn't home, this is your grandparents'," Lorelai wrapped her arms round Rory's shoulder holding her tight.

"No I don't mean that, I do but I don't, Grandma's perfume and the books. The smells, this is home, it's stupid…"

"Here we are" Emily came back holding a carrier bag, "What is it?" she frowned slightly as Lorelai giggled.

"Nothing Mom, Rory was just saying you smell…"

"No I didn't," Rory playfully swatted at her mother. "I said you smelt of home, your perfume, it's familiar, it's nice. I missed it."

"Well," Emily gave a soft happy sigh as a pleased smile played on her lips. "I got you this as part of your birthday gift."

"You already got her a present," Lorelai countered as her mother handed the bag over to Rory. "Which if you don't want I will totally take off your hands."

Emily frowned as she sank into the couch beside Rory "Well you said to keep that gift light and then Rory said she was getting cold and I was shopping… Open it, see if you like it." Rory did as she was told and opened the bag. "Now the girl in the store said it's the best in the range," Emily explained as Rory pulled out a black jacket. "It's meant for people who are hiking, so its light weight and breathable but keeps the heat in, its water proof and there is a hood. I thought with you going all over the country with any weather possible it was a practical choice. I chose black to stay professional but it has bright blue lining for a bit of youthful funk. Do you like it?"

"It's great Grandma" Rory ran her hand over the fabric before kissing her grandmother in gratitude, "It's just what I need."

"Good, I'm glad," Emily carefully folded the discarded bag. "now let's call your grandfather" Emily quickly dialled the number of Richards's cell phone. "Hello Richard...yes I am but we have an unexpected visitor who is rather upset you're not here and I promised her that we could call you...yes it's Rory...no we didn't know at all...yes Richard I am aware of that...did you want to talk to her?...alright I'm handing you over" Emily handed over the phone to Rory who quickly rose from her seat and scurried out the room.

Lorelai stared at the closed door for a few moments. "Should we be offended?"

Emily shook her head tiredly, "goodness know what they talk about but your father always takes her call privately in the study. He gets a good extra 10 minutes on the phone with her."

Lorelai stifled a laugh at her mother pouting expression. "The coat is great Mom," she changed the subject.

"I'm glad she liked it, there was so much choice" Emily lifted the discarded coat and neatly folded it "I had no idea that there was such a demand for clothing used in outdoor pursuits."

"Well there are some crazy folk in the world, wanting to hike up mountains and other such dumb things like that," Lorelai smiled affably at her mother. "If she gets the coat does that mean I can have her spa vouchers?"

"No." Emily gave her a withering look.

"What spa vouchers?" Rory asked as she slipped back into the room.

"Lorelai!" Emily huffed in annoyance.

"How was I supposed to know she was about to come back in?" Lorelai protested. "You were the one who said ten minutes."

"Oh should I not know?" Rory sank back onto the couch in between her mother and grandmother.

"Your grandma and grandpa got you fancy spa vouchers," Lorelai ignored her mother's annoyed expression.

"Well thank you for ruining that surprise," Emily rolled her eyes. "I thought you deserved to be pampered. The vouchers are for a spa chain that operate within hotels across the country. I thought a periodic massage throughout your travels or a nice manicure," she cast a disapproving look at Rory's less than perfect nails, "would ease some of the rigours of the road."

"Grandma that would be great." Rory kissed Emily on the cheek. "A massage would be lovely."

"Good," Emily smiled pleasantly. "If you spend them wisely you should be able to get 10 standard massages according to their price list, but if you need to make up the difference, let me know and I will arrange it," she raised her eyebrows as Lorelai and Rory looked at her incredulously. "What is it?"

"Ten treatments, Grandma that's too much!"

"Nonsense," Emily shook her head. "My granddaughter deserves to be spoiled."

"If you don't want them, I'll have them," Lorelai poked Rory in the side childishly.

Emily sent another glowering look in her daughter's direction. "You will do no such thing, and if you're that desperate for a spa day I will happily arrange one. Maybe we could go together."

"No you're good," Lorelai shook her head. "Last time your Grandma took me to a spa she arranged us a couple's massage," she whispered conspiratorially to Rory.

Rory giggled "Isn't that for couples like married couples?"

"Uh huh," Lorelai grinned cheekily. She caught the look in her mother's eye that told her she had crossed a line and she held her hand up in defeated apology. "I'm just pulling your leg Mom."

"Well don't," Emily folded her arms.

"If you get stuck for ideas for Christmas though," Lorelai threw the blanket over her and Rory's legs. "Then I wouldn't say no to spa vouchers."

"I already have your Christmas present," Emily answered quickly.

Lorelai blinked in surprise. "It's September!"

"So?"

"So it's September," Lorelai stared at her mother incredulously.

"Well I saw it and thought of you." Emily gave her daughter an amused smile. "Is this going to annoy you until you get it?" When Lorelai nodded her smile widened. "Good. Now Rory can I get you anything."

"No I'm good," Rory shook her head. "I just wanna watch the movie."

"Should we restart?" Emily stopped Lorelai as she reached for the remote.

"It's fine, I've already seen it so it doesn't really matter." Rory snuggled down into the couch.

"You've already seen the movie?" Emily raised her eyebrows surprised, she looked past her granddaughter to her daughter. "Have you seen it before?"

"Sure," Lorelai nodded. "I've seen all the movies we've watched. I watch movies all the time," she frowned at her mother's surprised look. "Mom these movies are all like 40 years old did you really think I hadn't seen them?"

"Well…" Emily considered the question. "If you've seen all the movies and watch them all the time. How is movie night our thing?"

"I don't just watch movies with you mom," Lorelai cast a sideways look at Rory, silently telling her daughter to help her out. "It's our thing that we do without Dad, and think of it this way I'm sharing an important aspect of my life with you. You like it when I do that."

"Yeah and I like planning it with you," Rory patted Emily's knee. "I get to think about what to suggest, it's something nice to think about when I'm stuck on my own in a motel. Come on Grandma," Rory shifted slightly. "Let's watch the movie. It's our movie night, we gotta. Come on Mom press play."

"You got it little girl," Lorelai set the movie running and placed the remote on the coffee table allowing her the chance to pick up some Twizzlers and hand them to her daughter. She settled down beside Rory and held her daughter's free hand relishing the contact after so long apart. Her expert ear could tell by Rory's breathing that her daughter was succumbing to tiredness but it was her mother's soft surprised _'oh'_ as Rory's head made contact with Emily's shoulder 10 minutes later that confirmed Rory had fallen asleep. "You Ok Mom?"

"I'm fine," Emily voice was barely audible as if she was afraid that she might wake Rory. "Is she Ok like this?"

"For a little while," Lorelai pulled the blanket over Rory and tucked it around her, the movement woke Rory slightly and Lorelai flinched.

"Mom?" Rory's sleepy voice.

"Go back…" Lorelai started to whisper.

"Lie down Rory," Emily interrupted Lorelai softly as she carefully stood up and guided her granddaughter to lie on the couch.

More than half asleep Rory allowed herself to be repositioned to lay on the couch by her mother and grandmother. Spread across the soft couch she snuggled down into it and gripped the blankets that were placed over her.

"Sit Lorelai," Emily ordered her daughter, inclining her head towards the space beside Rory's head.

Lorelai sat in the small space and placed her hand on Rory's shoulder. "Where are you going?" she asked Emily in confusion as her mother moved to the doorway.

"To make Rory's bed up. She's too tired to drive home and with the cars it is easier. Will you stay also?" Emily told Lorelai quietly; getting a nod from Lorelai she turned the lamp out and quietly left the room.

Lorelai stared at the door for a few moments. Her mother was right, staying over was the right thing to do, Rory needed her rest. She smiled as she watched her daughter. Asleep she looked so young, it made it hard to believe that she was grown. She turned her attention to the still rolling movie but every little sound from Rory made her look down.

After a ten minutes Emily returned and after a moment's hesitation she moved to sit in the small space at the other end of the couch by Rory's feet.

"I can't believe she came all this way to see us for one night," Emily's voice sounded overly happy. "Rory is here," she tenderly rested her hand on Rory's legs, similar to the way Lorelai was touching Rory's shoulder. "It's so wonderful that she's here."

"It is," Lorelai agreed, a momentary flash of jealousy flushing across her as she took in the easy and tender way her mother was touching Rory.

"Plus there is the added bonus of a sleep over," Emily sounded strangely victorious. "I get my girls for breakfast."

Lorelai turned to look at her mother. Emily was staring at her triumphantly, but Lorelai could see the look behind, the mixture of challenge and nervousness. "I guess you do." Emily gave her a beaming smile, the challenge dropping from her eyes leaving only a look of pure happiness. Lorelai turned her attention back to the movie. It wasn't so bad staying over, Staying over had only happened once before and the morning after she had been victim of a Siberian cold front from her mother. But Rory was here. That made everything OK. With Rory here it meant it would probably be the Bahamas of breakfasts. Lorelai cast a sideways glance at her mother at the end of the couch and despite herself she scowled. Emily looked immeasurably happy and she knew it was because Rory was here. She shook her head at the ridiculousness of her thoughts. She had never been jealous of Rory's relationship with her parents, she'd only ever felt guilt about the fact that she had kept them apart for so long. But something now, something about how her mother was interacting with Rory was making her green eyed monster act out and she had no idea what it was.


	4. Chapter 4

_**So, a little bit of a change this chapter, but still one of boundaries get blurred. Also a little bit of Richard. Hope you guys enjoy**_

 **A New Phase, Chapter 4**

The December wind was biting and despite the beauty of the swirling snow Lorelai shivered as she slid out of the jeep. She paused before she moved to make sure she didn't slip. It had rained heavily 2 days before the snow had started and when the temperature had plunged, it had created an ice rink like scenario that the soft snow was now settled on. It was an accident waiting to happen. So far, that she knew of, only Kirk had fallen badly, but being that Kirk was the fluke of nature he was, he had been miraculously unhurt. She locked the jeep and turned to walk towards Luke's. As she pushed her keys into her purse she looked up, narrowly avoiding being sprayed by slush and ice thrown up by Garage tow truck as it drove passed. She scowled after it before her mouth dropped open in shock as she saw the vehicle being transported. A dark green jaguar, the front bumper on the passenger side scraped and scuffed, the passenger side rear tire completely shredded the front wheel twisted at an unnatural angle. "Oh My God!" Lorelai moved after the truck, careful not to slip but moving as fast as she could. As she reached the garage her father was helping her mother from the cab of the tow truck. "Mom, Dad!" she skidded as she came to a halt beside them. "What happened? Are you OK?" Her father barely seemed to have heard her as he was focused on Emily who was white as a sheet. "Dad?"

"Lorelai?" Richard looked up at her in confusion. "Did I call you?"

"No, I saw the car," Lorelai studied her father, his confusion worried her, her mother's quietness worried her "What happened?" she repeated hoping for an answer this time.

"I hit black ice," Richard gave a shuddering breath. "The car just skidded out, we mounted the bank and…" he trailed off, his attention turned back to Emily who swayed slightly and looked like she was about to faint. "Emily?"

"Mom," Lorelai stepped in and wrapped her arm around her mother's waist. If Richard had been driving Emily's side of the car had taken the brunt of the accident. She scanned her mother, she didn't seem injured just shocked, but that was just as dangerous. "Mom, say something," she pinched Emily's arm. It worked as it made her mother blink in the first time in ages before slowly turning her head to look at Lorelai in annoyance. "Hey, there you are!"

"Lorelai?" Emily blinked in confusion.

"You're in Stars Hollow Mom, I saw you pull in," Lorelai explained quickly, Emily was trembling, whether it be from cold or shock Lorelai knew she needed to get her inside.

"Can you look after her, while I sort this out," Richard asked surveying the Jag, his own face paling. Lorelai nodded. "Take her to the inn," Richard told her softly. He kissed Emily softly on the cheek. "Emily, Lorelai is going to take you to the Inn. Have dinner with her. I will come by later once I've sorted out the car," he spoke slowly like he was speaking to a child. His words got a soft nod from Emily. "Good girl," he kissed his wife once more. "Thank you Lorelai."

Lorelai nodded and let her father move away from her allowing her to assess how much Emily was taking her own weight and how much had been her father propping her up. "Hey Mom, we're going to go to the jeep now, OK?" Emily only nodded, normally that type of patronising tone would have elicited an angry retort. Lorelai swallowed her concern as best she could, trying to keep her voice measured as she walked her mother across the slippery road to the jeep. She practically had to push Emily up into the high jeep. The lack of annoyance shown by her mother scared her most of all. Her mother did not like to be manhandled or babied. Emily's acceptance of it showed just how far from alright she was. Lorelai scooped her phone out of her purse quickly making 2 calls. One to Luke to ask him to keep an eye on her father and the other to the Inn to ensure a room was ready for their arrival. She stuffed her phone back into her bag and leapt in. Ensuring her mother was belted in she whacked up the heat and drove off towards the Inn as carefully but quickly as she could.

The drive passed in silence, Lorelai glancing across at her mother when it was safe to do so. She pulled her jeep up to the entrance of the inn and hopped out, running round so she could help her mother out the car. "Mom?" she called when Emily didn't react to the door opening, "Mom, we're here." She reached towards her mother, panic taking over it and tugged her mother's arm.

"Lorelai?" Emily sounded annoyed, Lorelai gave a sigh of relief and helped Emily climb down from the car. "What am I doing here?" Emily asked in confusion as she stared up at the Inn.

"Dad's sorting the car," Lorelai told her as she bumped the door closed with her hip and guided Emily up towards the warm and welcoming Inn. "You're going to stay here tonight until it's all sorted, alright?" Lorelai guided Emily into the foyer. She grabbed the room key from the member of staff covering reception. "Ok up we go."

"I'm not a child Lorelai," Emily retorted looking around the Inn in confusion. "Why am I here?"

"The car?" Lorelai studied her mother closely. "Did you hit your head?"

"No, I did not," Emily shook her head angrily. "What room?"

"9," Lorelai followed Emily as she made her way up the stairs, relieved that her mother appeared to be coming out of the shock she had been suffering. Letting her mother into the room she stood back and waited for her mother to engage with her. Emily paced round the room, Lorelai could sense the danger. Her mother was about to melt down or pick a fight. Emily was confused and not in control of what was happening to her something that never went down well.

Suddenly Emily sat on the bed and looked at Lorelai her eyes filled with tears. "I don't have anything to wear."

"I can take care of that," Lorelai assured her. "Do you want me to get you something to eat?"

"I don…yes please," Emily nodded softly. "Where's your father?"

"He's sorting the car out," Lorelai moved to stand in front of her mother. "Are you OK for me to leave you for a bit?" Getting another nod from her mother Lorelai quickly backed out of the room and raced downstairs to the kitchen.

"Are they OK?" Sookie jumped on her as she entered.

"I guess, Mom's pretty spaced," Lorelai accepted the offered hug.

"I've got mushroom soup and braised lamb shank. Do you want anything sweet, I've got shortbread," Sookie scurried over to her ready prepared dishes. "I'll keep some aside for your Dad."

Lorelai smiled at her friend, "Thanks Sook, I've just gotta grab something. I'll be back in a sec." She dashed into the store cupboard and quickly found something for her mother to wear within the uniform store. Entering the kitchen she found Sookie putting the finishing touches to an elaborate dinner tray.

"Think it will get the Emily stamp of approval?" Sookie surveyed the tray.

"It's great Sookie," Lorelai lifted the tray. "Thanks for doing this."

"No worries," Sookie called after her as Lorelai strode quickly out of the kitchen.

Lorelai moved as quickly as she could up the stairs with the full tray, she did not want to leave Emily alone any longer than necessary given how out of it her mother seemed. Bustling back into the room she frowned at the sight of her mother sat in the same position on the bed. "Here we go Mom," she called brightly, "Sookie's outdone herself. Do you want to change then eat, or eat then change?" She set the tray down on the top of the dresser. "Huh? Which would you prefer?"

Emily looked up as she considered the illusion of choice that her daughter was giving her. "I'm cold."

"Alright, so why don't you get out of those cold clothes and into bed. Dinner in bed as a treat from having the life frightened out of you?" Lorelai moved forward and held out the shirt to her mother. "There is a robe to wear over it."

"It's a shirt," Emily regarded the pink shirt. "I can't wear just a shirt."

"It's a 2XL Mom, it will swallow you and come down to your knees," She moved to stand in front of Emily. "Besides Dad likes your legs, he deserves a treat too."

"Lorelai! Emily gave her a disapproving look.

"Now that's more like the Emily Gilmore I know and love," Lorelai gave her mother a cheeky grin. "Come on get out of these cold clothes." She helped Emily pull her arms out of her coat. Her mother was freezing, her hands like ice. She knew she should turnaround and let her mother undress herself but this way it was faster. When Emily was down to her slip the older woman seemed to become more lucid, her body stiffening as she seemed to realise her daughter was helping her undress. Lorelai, finely attuned to her mother's body language took the hint before the fight could start, "OK, I'll sort the food out, you finish up." She made her way over to the tray, which required no prep at all except taking the cloche off so began fiddling with the TV as a way to give her mother some privacy.

"Lorelai."

Loralai picked up the tray and turned. "Ok hop into bed then," she frowned as her mother padded round the bedframe, wondering what on earth Emily was doing before it occurred to her that Emily was getting into her side of the bed. When Emily was situated Lorelai carefully positioned the tray over Emily's legs and removed the cloche. "Eat what you can OK," she forced the issue by picking up the spoon and handing it to Emily. "And look," she pointed to the TV, "Singing in the Rain's just starting." Everything in place Lorelai moved round to the other side of the bed and sat down. Emily picked at the food for a couple of minutes managing a couple of mouthfuls before Lorelai sensed it was a losing battle. "Not hungry, huh?"

"It's delicious, but no," Emily shook her head. "Please apologise to Sookie."

Lorelai nodded pleased with her mother's improved level of communication even if she hadn't eaten much. "Do you want the shortcake? The sugar may help." When Emily shook her head Lorelai climbed off the bed to take the tray and set it one side. As she took the tray her hands brushed against Emily's and she frowned, her mother was still cold as ice. Quickly setting the tray on the table Lorelai made her way round to the other side of the bed and after a few moments pulled back the cover and climbed under.

"What are you doing?" Emily asked, turning her head slowly from watching the movie to stare at her daughter.

"You're cold, I'm sharing my body heat," Lorelai explained as she pulled the covers back into position. "Put your hands under the covers."

"You don…" Emily mumbled as Lorelai forced her icy hands under the blankets. "Thank you," her voice was barely above a whisper.

"It's OK Mom," Lorelai smiled uneasily keeping hold of her mother's hand, feeling some of the warmth from her own hands leech into her mother's ice cold ones. Vulnerable Emily accepting help was something new to her. "Let's just watch the movie OK?"

"It's a wonderful movie," Emily smiled as she squeezed Lorelai's hand.

"One of the best," Lorelai agreed, "and added bonus of unexpected movie night."

Emily gave her a mildly happy smile and snuggled under the covers slightly, as they fell into their normal watching pattern, sitting in silence with Lorelai glancing over to check her mother's reaction only this time with the added concern of checking her mother was alright.

As the movie went on relief filled Lorelai as she could feel the warmth coming back into Emily's hands and her mother's face became more expressive as she relaxed. Near the end of the movie there was a faint knock on the door and Lorelai finally released Emily's hand and climbed out of the bed. Opening the door she found her father but before she could open her mouth to greet him, he beckoned to her to come out onto the hallway. Doing as she was told Lorelai pulled the door to, and followed her Richard down the hallway.

"How is your mother?" Richard finally spoke.

Lorelai glanced over her shoulder towards the room. "She seems more with it now, she's warmed up. Didn't eat much but she's more Mom like then when we came in."

"Good," Richard gave a sigh of relief, before taking a big breath and pulling himself tall. "Lorelai."

She steadied herself, the tone reeked of her father being disappointed with her. "Dad."

"You and Luke," her father half asked half stated.

"Me and Luke," Lorelai crossed her arms, sensing what was coming.

Richard's shoulders rose before falling dramatically and Lorelai's eyes widened as she took in the defeated look that her father gave her. "Why did you not tell your mother and I that you were back together and have been together for quite a while."

Lorelai shifted awkwardly, asking Luke to check in on her father had obviously finally connected the dots in her father's brain about the relationship that she hadn't told them about. "We just ... If I tell you, it's formal. When me and Luke get formal things go wrong. Going with the flow works for us," she looked down at her shoes, her father's gaze making her feel like a small child. "I like it when it works for us."

"I see," Richard's voice was soft. "I…I wish you feel you could tell us," he straightened.

"Dad," Lorelai reached for his arm. "It's not that I didn't want to tell you it's just that I don't want things to go wrong."

"And we make it go wrong?" Richard scowled.

"No," Lorelai shook her head. "Not you. Pressure makes it go wrong."

"We pressurize you?" Richard took a deep breath.

"I don't mean it like that. Dad please," Lorelai tried to touch her father's arm again but he stepped back just out of her reach. "I'm not keeping you out…"

"Your mother has wondered about it for a while." Richard interrupted her. "It upsets her when you purposefully…"

"Dad, I'm not!" Lorelai shook her head once again. "The only thing I'm trying to do is make sure my relationship works. I don't mean to upset you or Mom."

Richard exhaled deeply once more, adding to the impression that he was deflating. "I won't tell your mother."

"Alright," Lorelai nodding, knowing that was her father's way of telling her she would have to. "Did you eat?"

"Yes I did," Richard told her tiredly. "The dealership will be collecting the car tomorrow."

"I can take you back to Hartford tomorrow if it's easier or Mom, whichever works," Lorelai offered. "Why don't I meet you back here for breakfast and we can work it out."

"Thank you," Richard nodded, "and thank you for looking after your mother."

"Of course," Lorelai smiled relief flooding into her as her father smiled back at her. "Call me if you need anything."

She watched as her father entered the room. She was relieved that they were both OK, and weirdly relieved that her father was now aware of her relationship. Now all she had to contend with was building up the nerve to tell her mother about the fact she was in a relationship with Luke and had been for 6 months. What a delight that would be.


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you to everyone for reading. Time for a little honesty from Lorelai about Luke. Hope you guys enjoy x**

A New Phase Chapter 5

For the fifth time Lorelai felt her mother's gaze on her and she resisted the urge to turn and look at her. It was the first movie night of the New Year, the first movie night since the talk with her father following the car accident. She had yet to tell her mother about Luke despite her father's leading, ' _and what's new with you Lorel_ ai' at the previous two post-holiday Friday Night Dinners. She had answered him with flippancy which had earned an annoyed look from her father and a disappointed one from her mother. Tonight had been no different; Emily had given her usual weekly download before the discussion had led to Rory and a hopeful ' _how is everyone at Stars Hollow'_ Lorelai had answered with stories about Sookie and Jackson's kids and Kirk's latest mishap which took up enough time for them to finish their dinner. But she knew there was no getting away from it; she had to tell her mother that she and Luke had been back together for over 6 months. She sighed and leaned forward to get the remote. Her inability to communicate with her mother on important subjects had reached the point where she was in danger of ruining the status quo of pleasantness that had established over the last few months. Emily was at saturation point and had seemingly held her tongue for as long as she was able. If Lorelai didn't tell her it was going to end in a massive horrible fight and ruin everything. She stopped the movie and turned to face Emily.

"Why did you stop the movie?" Emily asked her voice raising dangerously.

"Mom,"

"It breaks your rules," Emily pointed out, looking slightly startled.

"Mom," Lorelai stood up and crossed to the light switch so the room could be fully illuminated. "Could we go downstairs please?"

"We're watching a movie, its movie night." Emily seemed to sink further into the couch in protest. "This is where we watch movies. Why do you want to go downstairs?"

"Because I like this room," Lorelai sighed and reached for the door. "And the living room has alcohol." She pulled the door open "and is closer to the exit" she muttered under her breath. "I would like to talk to you and I'll be downstairs."

She quickly made her way down to the ground floor of her parents' house and made herself a martini and her mother a Gin and tonic. She could hear Emily moving upstairs but she had yet to make it downstairs. The wait was excruciating and Lorelai wondered if her mother was doing it on purpose so that she would have the upper hand.

After what felt like an eternity Emily finally appeared down the stairs, holding a small red gift bag. She moved to what was her usual seat besides which Lorelai had placed her drink and hesitated before picking up the glass and sitting beside Lorelai on the couch.

Lorelai blinked in surprise at the closeness, silently cursing her mother for sitting beside her as it had thrown her off her train of thought and also meant that there was no longer the coffee table that could act as a barrier. "Mom," she exhaled and forced herself to uncross her arms. "I need to tell you something."

"Alright," Emily's face was impassive, a perfect mask to go with her perfect hair.

"Luke and I are back together," Lorelai told her softly. "We have been for a while."

Emily took a sip of her drink. The pause was interminably long before she finally spoke, her voice calm and collected, measured, like she was carrying out a transaction. "Well I think that's lovely. I hope you are both happy."

"Yes, we are."

"Good." Emily took another sip of her drink. "Thank you for telling me."

Lorelai stared at Emily like she had grown another head, whenever she told her mother something important like this it was always met with a perfunctory remark one might give a stranger. She sighed she didn't know why she had expected anything else but it hurt, she could never understand why Emily couldn't be more expressive about things like this. She sighed heavily and opened her mouth to tell her mother that they should go back upstairs, "That's it!" came tumbling out instead She groaned internally, and closed her eyes in desperation, mentally making a note to pick up a mallet to bash herself in the head with. When she opened her eyes, she shuddered at the look on her mother's face; A mixture of sadness and disappointment and hurt.

"What do you want me to say Lorelai?" Emily scowled and clutched her glass tightly. "I thought anything other then what I had just said would cause an argument. Clearly I was wrong and nothing I can say would be right." Emily took a deep breath and the words that she had been holding within her since she had figured out about her daughter's relationship spilled from her mouth in an angry tirade. "I have tried to respect your privacy. Despite the fact that you're clearly hiding your life from me again. Despite what I thought was an improved relationship you still want to keep me out. I thought we had proved to you how much we accepted Luke when we offered to buy you a house. You father and I were prepared to spend a huge amount of money on you and Luke. Didn't that show you that we accepted him? I saw how unhappy you were with Christopher, I saw what that did to you. You are so much happier when you are with Luke. He might not be what I wanted for you but he is exactly perfect for you, despite everything he has going against him. I thought I'd shown you that I accepted him. Yet you still hid it from me, for months you hid it from me. I've known for months. The light in your eyes has been back. Even with Rory gone. You've been happier. I waited for you to tell me. Given you opportunity after opportunity for you to tell me. I just simply don't understand what else I need to do to make you let me in, why you felt you needed to hide this from me. I thought we were doing better…" she trailed off and her shoulder sagged.

Lorelai blinked, feeling battered by her mother's sudden onslaught. She set her glass down on the table. "Mom, I didn't mean to hide it. I just didn't want to show it off." She folded her arms around her middle trying to shield herself from anything else that Emily would throw at her.

"But why didn't you tell me? How is telling your mother showing it off? Why do you find it so hard to believe that all I want is for you to be happy?" Emily bleated, her brown eyes wide and filled with a mixture of desperation and fear.

Lorelai cringed at her mother's words. "Because we have different ideas of what happy should be Mom." She shook her head and reached forward as if she was going to take Emily's hand before changing her mind diverting her hands to pick at the hem of her skirt. "Mom, this wasn't about you, it was about me, me and Luke and making us work the way we needed to. Making sure we could fit April in and I could deal with no Rory. It was about figuring out what our life is. We needed to do that."

"And have you?" Emily sat up straight, seemingly pulling herself together. "After all this time, have you and Luke figured out what your life is?" her eyes flicked over Lorelai studying her intently.

"We've figured it out for now," Lorelai conceded resisting the urge to flinch at her mother's scrutiny. "We've found our pattern, our rhythm and we're happy."

"And what is your rhythm?" Emily pressed her lips together preventing herself from asking the question that she really wanted; terrified she would send another diatribe at her daughter.

"We're just us, Luke and Lorelai, Lorelai and Luke, sometimes just Lorelai, sometimes just Luke. No Fuss no Muss. We spend time together, we enjoy each other's company, we're dating," Lorelai shrugged trying to make it seem less than it was.

"Alright," Emily took a deep breath before swallowing the last measure of her drink. "May I make a request?" Lorelai nodded, "If your rhythm changes will you please tell me?"

"OK," Lorelai shrugged again, "It won't; but sure."

"It might," Emily put her glass down on the table. "You might decide to get married again, you might get pregnant."

Lorelai shrunk back into the uncomfortable chair, she could see the longing in her mother's eyes. She had seen it when Emily had planned the wedding party for her and Christopher and had mistakenly assumed she was pregnant. "Oh Mom."

"You're not getting any younger," Emily shuffled in her seat, "and these things get harder as you…" she waved her hand to indicate the passage of time.

Lorelai held up her hand to indicate she understood. "If and I mean if we get there then yes I will tell you."

"Before the actual wedding date and before you go into labor," Emily smiled attempting to interject humour.

"I think you might notice if I rock up with a stomach the size of a basketball. I mean you see all." Lorelai rolled her eyes. At Emily's hopeful look she added. "I'll tell you."

"Good," Emily gave a sigh of relief. "Luke is welcome to join us for any Friday night dinners… Only if he would like to."

"I'll ask," Lorelai conceded, "but he works late with the diner. But maybe."

"Good," Emily gave her a shy smile and looked down at the bag at her feet. "I got him a gift for..."

"You got Luke a gift?" Lorelai interrupted following her mother's gaze to the red bag.

"Well I had hoped we might have discussed this before Christmas and…well… it's rude not to provide a guest with a gift," Emily handed it to Lorelai.

"Is it chocolate? Because that won't reach Stars Hollow," Lorelai joked taking the bag. It was remarkably light and she peeked inside. Despite herself she reached in for the card, a glossy promo picture of two bearded ponytailed young men with flashy fake smiles leaning against a keg holding glasses of beer.

"It's a voucher, for a microbrewery tour," Emily explained her voice excited. "When I was researching spa ideas for the Dragonfly I came across a wonderful experiences website. I appreciate that Luke isn't a belongings type of man and experiences are all the rage now. I thought he might find it interesting. He just needs to call up and book. It's all paid for."

Lorelai bit her lips to prevent her from laughing at her mother's gesture, Luke would never in a million years have thought to look at a microbrewery, something he would probably mock and deride, especially given the proprietors image. But Emily knew that Luke liked to drink beer and this was a way to gentrify nitwit juice in a way that she found palatable, it was sweet in a way only Emily Gilmore could manage. Lorelai used the act of reading the details on the postcard as a way to push the desire to laugh down so that her voice sounded level. "I'm sure he'll love it. Thanks Mom."

Emily gave her a relieved smile. "I'm glad." She looked hopefully towards the staircase. "May we finish the movie?"

Lorelai tucked the bag over her wrist and got stood up. "We may."

Emily rose quicker than Lorelai expected and once again she forced herself not to smile. There was something different about her mother's eyes and the way she moved. She looked lighter and younger, content at being included even if all she was included in was an admittance of something happening. Lorelai followed Emily back up the stairs to the top of the house. There was a bounce in her mother's step and despite herself she smiled. It felt good to make her mother happy, it was a blissful change to disappointing her.


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you every one who's reading. Ok so fair warning some of you might find this one sad. Don't hate me :) . You have to break down to build up.**

 **A New Phase-Chapter 6**

Lorelai forced a wide smile on her face as she pressed the doorbell to her parents' house. She had had the day from hell and having to spend the night alone with her mother was the last thing she wanted to do especially as she was now over an hour late. She was just not in the mood for whatever snipes and gripes that Emily was going to throw at her for being late. She had spent the last 3 days with Rory in Seattle and was already feeling crabby about having to leave her daughter when the flight home had been delayed by 4 hours because of some mechanical problems. She rang the bell once more, annoyed at having to wait. She had called her mother from Seattle airport and was only here because Emily had sounded so dejected that their movie night was not going to happen. Emily opened the door with a look of confusion across her face, which erupted in delight as she saw Lorelai "Lorelai?"

"Hey Mom."

"I didn't think you would be back," Emily stepped back to allow Lorelai into the house. "How is Rory?"

"She's great," Lorelai smiled despite her crabby mood. "We had a good couple days catching up."

"Good, I'm glad," Emily closed the door holding onto the handle as she looked Lorelai up and down. "Can I get you anything to eat?"

Lorelai shook her head. "I grabbed a sandwich at the airport, plus I had a big lunch with Rory before I got on the plane the first time. I would have called but my cell died. I said I would try and get here." Lorelai gave her mother the same critical look over she had just received and frowned, Emily was wearing slippers, and was free from jewellery giving her a distinct under-dressed look. "Mom isn't it like 8.15? Were you getting ready for bed?"

"No," Emily shook her shoulders in mild annoyance, "I was about to read my book."

Lorelai rolled her eyes. "Well do you still want to do movie night coz I am more than happy to head home after the day…"

"No I want to," Emily interrupted her expression momentarily crestfallen before she straightened up. "I have the candy in the kitchen. I'll get it. You head upstairs and pick the movie. The DVD's are in the cabinet."

Lorelai gave a huff of annoyance and rolled her eyes as Emily scurried off; frustrated that after all of this she hadn't actually needed to come as her mother hadn't been expecting her anyway. She stomped up the stairs to the den. Opening the cabinet door her annoyance drained out of her as she took in the full collection. It was every movie they had watched or had been offered as a selection. It occurred to her that she had never paid attention to the cases and she had always assumed that her mother had just rented the movies but here they all were.

"Did you pick?" Emily asked bustling into the room with a tray holding 2 bowls, 2 bottles of spring water and several candy boxes.

"You bought all the movies," Lorelai turned to look at her. Emily set the tray down and looked at her blankly "You could've just rented the movies."

"Oh" Emily joined her by the cabinet "Well, this way we can watch them again. So what do you want to watch?"

Lorelai shrugged "You pick, they're all great," she turned and stumbled to the couch flopping down with a heavy sigh.

"We don't have to watch the movie," Emily told her softly, "If you want to talk…"

Lorelai waved her hand dismissively. "No I'm good."

"You seem out of sorts," Emily selected a DVD and moved to put it in the player watching Lorelai intently. "Is it just the flight delay or is it Rory?"

"Bit of both," Lorelai kicked off her shoes and pouted. "I'm not going to see her for ages. Stupid political roadshow carnival." She waved her hand at her mother's concerned look. "I'm just crabby and on a caffeine crash. Seattle is a coffee drinker's Promised Land. I drank way too much."

"I can get you coffee," Emily hovered in front of her. At Lorelai's dismissive shake of her head she sank elegantly onto the couch. "Are you sure you don't want to talk."

"No," Lorelai took a cleansing sigh. "I'm fine, I'm just grumpy. We should just watch the movie." She reached for the remote. "Oh wait," she looked across at Emily. "I wanted to ask you something. Rory and I got caught in the rain, because it's Seattle so it rains and I don't know what is was but I had this flash of like a memory but it's so not something I can ever see happening and I just wanted to ask if it actually did?" On her mother's enquiring look she carried on. "I was like a little kid and we holding each other hands and we were spinning out on the patio in the pouring rain," her eyes widened as her mother shifted awkwardly and suddenly became very interested in her hands. "It happened?"

"Yes," Emily answered, her voice tight. "You were five."

"How on earth did I convince you to do that?" Lorelai asked reaching for the candy.

"Let's watch the movie Lorelai," Emily tried to snatch the remote from Lorelai, trying to pull it from her hand.

"Mom?" Lorelai stared at her mother in confusion, surprised by the sudden shift in her mother's disposition and the fact that her mother had done something so rude as to snatch. "Mom, what happened, why were we in the rain?"

"I don't want to discuss this Lorelai," Emily hissed.

"Fine!" Lorelai shrugged, her annoyance creeping back in and she turned her attention to the remote, "so it was a childhood memory. It seemed like a nice, crazy thing that we did. We never did many of those. You know were all about the openness right now I figured you might want to talk about it. Obviously it was just another time when I as a kid were I was being a pain in the butt…

"You were not, You were trying to make me feel better."

Lorelai swallowed, her anger vanishing, she had never heard her mother's voice so soft and small. Emily sounded like a frightened child, a frightened child who was about to cry. She turned her head to look at her mother who had somehow managed to make herself sit up straighter while crumple in on herself. "Mom," she frowned as Emily looked away and she shifted along the couch so that she was sat right next to her mother. "Mom I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you…I just…Mom what?"

Emily sat up straight; her back so straight it looked like it would snap. "Your father and I had had some bad news," she finally looked at Lorelai before she tried to snatch the remote again. "Please Lorelai…" she gulped as Lorelai took her hand and several sentences tumbled out in a jumble. "I can't…the movie… please Lorelai…we…please…please!"

"Mom?" Lorelai stared at her mother in complete confusion as guilt washed over her for appearing to have genuinely upset her mother, "Mom?" finally she brought up her hand to rest on her Emily's shoulder trying to provide her mother comfort. Emily seemed to crumple her body sagging as if Lorelai's hand had weighed hundreds of pounds and had overwhelmed her.

Suddenly Emily was moving; stumbling out of her seat towards the doorway. Lorelai moved just as quickly, she was younger, faster and had longer legs and she reached the door first preventing her mother from opening the door and running away from her. Whatever this was, whatever she had opened it needed to be said. "Mom, we're not leaving this room till you tell me," Emily stood frozen staring at her; radiating distress. Her eyes were so filled with unshed tears Lorelai wondered if she could even see. "Mom please!" she tried again. "Mom!"

Any control that Emily had vanished, the tears began rolling down her cheeks and with a sob she sank down towards the ground. Lorelai rushed forward to catch her. She had only seen her mother cry once before but this was worse; it was terrifying. She had no context for what was going on, no clue what on earth it was that could cause her mother react in such a way. Lorelai did the only thing she could do and wrapped her arms around Emily holding her mother tightly as she choked out heart breaking sobs. It sounded like she was crying a lifetime of hurt. Everything she had held bottled within her for years. There was nothing that Lorelai could do but hold her mother and wait.

After what seemed like an eternity Emily stopped sobbing and Lorelai relaxed her grip. Emily was lifting her face away from Lorelai's sodden shoulder and Lorelai allowed her to shift to a more comfortable position. She reached for one of the water bottles and handed it to Emily. After a few sips of water Emily wiped her face. Lorelai frowned she could see it happening right before her eyes, her mother putting on her mask, building the walls. Whatever had caused the most heart breaking thing she had ever seen about to be locked away. "Mom, please tell me."

"I'm sorry, that was inappropriate," Emily straightened her top.

"Mom," Lorelai placed her hand on Emily's. "You've always wanted us to have a relationship like me and Rory have. Rory would tell me."

Emily regarded Lorelai with red eyes that were still trickling tears down her cheeks. It seemed to click with her that her stubborn daughter was not about to let her leave, she folded her arms around her middle and she took an exhausted and ragged breath. "We had been told not to get pregnant anymore, that it was too dangerous for me. I failed at the one thing that as women we are supposed to do. I couldn't have children. I failed your father."

Lorelai blinked at the coolness with which her mother had spoken, so matter of fact and distant. "I'm a hologram then, or is this your way of telling me I'm adopted." For once in her life there was no added humorous barb to send at her mother about how that would be a gift. Just genuine concern.

"You're not adopted," Emily frowned at her.

"Then how did you fail? I exist. You had a child Mom, you didn't fail," Lorelai took Emily hand and squeezed it "Explain how you failed."

"You think that one child was all we wanted? That your father only wanted a daughter?" Emily tried to pull her hand away from Lorelai. Lorelai could see she was getting angry, see the fight to keep the agony in check and she held fast preventing her mother from pulling away from her. "Your father wanted a son. I wanted to give him that, but I couldn't, it never worked, they always…" Emily took a shuddering breath unable to articulate the last part of her sentence.

"You had a…" Lorelai stopped herself, taking note of her mother's use of the plural pronoun, "you had miscarriages."

"Five," Emily spat the number. "One before you and four after."

"Oh Mom I'm so sorry," She tenderly stroked her thumb across the back of Emily's hand. Suddenly her mother's periodic aloofness towards her as a child, Emily's apparent lack of wanting to carry her made sense. If they had had the instruction when she was five then her mother had spent five years living with a never ending cycle of hope, terror and agony, both physical and mental. Lorelai had always been reminded that she was a handful as a child, and the terrifying thought struck her. "Was it anything that I did?" she asked nervously.

Emily looked at her aghast all anger gone from her voice. "No!"

"You didn't pick me up. It's one of my first memories I wanted you to carry me and you wouldn't pick me up" Lorelai whispered more to herself then to her mother.

Emily gave a shuddering sigh. "The first one after you was awful, I nearly died. When I got pregnant again, your father was terrified he didn't want anything to go wrong."

"So he stopped you from picking me up and he hired a Nanny," Lorelai put the pieces together in her mind. "Mom have you ever spoken about this to anyone?" Emily shook her head. "Do you think you should, that it would…" she trailed off as Emily gave her a look that told her that this was too far. "Ok, well I'm glad you told me. It makes things make sense."

Emily looked at her incredulously, "It does?"

"Yeah, some stuff from when I was a kid and a few things with Rory when she was tiny about how you looked at her and held her." She sighed and winced as the flood of awful things she used to say to her mother hit her. Now with this new context seeming so much worse. "I'm sorry about what I said to you back then. About her being mine. About how you were only a grandma and nothing else," she gave Emily a weak smile. "I guess I didn't realise how important being a grandma was. Gran was never…well you know how she was. I'm sorry if I added to this. I'm sorry for a lot of things." She patted Emily's hand, when she got no response to her apology she gave a heavy sigh before forcing a large smile on her face. "What do you want to do now Mom? Watch the movie or talk some more, go to bed?"

"I'd like to watch the movie," Emily stated weakly after a long pause. "I want you to stay, but I don't have energy to do anything else."

"Watching the movie it is then," Lorelai rocked back on her heels, not feeling the need to say that there was no way she was going to cut and run after what had just happened. The moment that Emily had started to cry had put any pay to her leaving to go home tonight. "Let's get you off the floor" she stood up and then pulled Emily to standing. She paused for a moment waiting, noticing the look on her mother's face that usually meant Emily was about to say something. When Emily remained silent she guided her mother the few feet to the couch. The look was still there and Lorelai could sense that Emily had something to say but clearly couldn't articulate it yet. She busied herself with the remote as she sat down, the candy forgotten. As the player whirred into action Lorelai sat back into the couch and took a deep intake of breath, calming herself over what had just happened.

She regarded her mother, taking in how she was perched on the edge of the couch and the ramrod posture almost like her mother was ready to bolt at any moment. "Mom sit back," she urged. She reached and gently pulled Emily's shoulder. Wordlessly Emily complied shifting so that she was seated as far into the couch as possible. Lorelai reached over her shoulder for the blanket pulling it off the back of the couch; the action shifted her closer to her mother, their thighs touching. Normally this invasion of space would feel wrong and one or both of them would instantly move but tonight neither woman did. Lorelai threw the blanket over both of them and then after a moments hesitation placed her arm around Emily's shoulder cuddling her mother into her side. She smiled as she heard her mother's soft sigh of contentment. Her smile widened as Emily rested her head on her shoulder. The position, just as the whole night had been, was so strange so unusual, but for once Lorelai didn't mind. There was no edge to what was happening. It was a tender moment, one that if it wasn't for the circumstances that had lead up to it Lorelai would have almost enjoyed. She had never been so physically close to her mother. She suddenly understood about what Rory had meant about the smell of home and her mother's perfume. It occurred to Lorelai that she would probably never get a chance to be this close to her mother again ever; Emily's guard was completely down, she was emotionally exhausted, fragile and in need of love and compassion. Lorelai knew that there wasn't many days that she satisfied her mother's expectations of her but tonight would be different, tonight she could be everything her mother needed.

"Lorelai?" Emily's voice was tiny and childlike.

Lorelai found the pause button ready to stop the movie if a need be, "Yeah Mom?"

"I'm sorry," Emily took a shuddering breath. "I shouldn't…"

"Mom," Lorelai interrupted. "It's OK," she tenderly rubbed Emily's shoulder. "Everything's OK."


	7. Chapter 7

**Halfway through, time for a little Luke :) Let me know what you think**

 **A New Phase - Chapter 7**

Lorelai looked up from the computer screen as the front door of the inn opened. She forced a smile at the already checked in patron as he made his way upstairs. Giving a nervous sigh she turned her attention back to the screen and tried to carry on working. It had been 3 weeks since she had last seen her mother. Three weeks since she had seen Emily at her most vulnerable and it seemed that it had been a step to far for her mother because as soon as the door had closed the next morning Lorelai had not managed to speak to her or see her. The previous 2 Friday night dinners had been called off, her father calling her to tell her first that they were both ill and then just her mother. Every time Lorelai had called to check up on Emily, the maid had always informed her that her mother was sleeping. It was upsetting and worrying to Lorelai and she had analysed everything she had said and done that night and the following morning. Other than actually making her mother talk and admit what she had been through there had been nothing that warranted the freeze out. Lorelai had been kind and gentle, respecting the fact that Emily hadn't wanted to talk much about anything the following morning. Yet it seemed that by being the closest she had ever been to her mother had created a new rift between them.

She shook her head and tried to focus on the computer screen. The dinner at the inn had been a desperate attempt at finding out what she had done wrong. It had been Luke who had finally come up with the solution. He had no desire to go to her parents' house but he could cope with the neutral venue of the Inn for Friday Night Dinner with her parents if she would like, he didn't mind acting as a lure if it helped her out. It had worked; her father somewhat excitedly accepting the invitation on behalf of her parents. So far they hadn't cancelled, and the fact that it was less than 10 minutes before they were due to arrive filled her with hope that she might be able to find out what it was that she had done wrong this time.

The door opened once more and she looked up, she gave a relieved smile as Luke skulked into the lobby, carefully checking around for her parents.

"They aren't here yet," Lorelai called to him. She pressed her lips together in amusement as Luke visibly relaxed. "You scrub up well," she gave him a once over. "It's so strange to see all of your face."

Luke self-consciously rubbed his clean shaven chin. "Well, can't give them anything to complain about," he stepped in behind the front desk so he could greet her properly, tenderly kissing her on the lips. "Hey, how was your day?"

"Oh you know,"

"Yeah I do." He gave her a sympathetic smile. "Where do you want me?"

"Why don't you wait in the library," Lorelai gave him a peck on the cheek.

"They'll show up," Luke assured her giving her hand a squeeze before he slipped away silently.

Lorelai futzed on the computer for a few minutes glancing up at the clock every 20 seconds until the night manager arrived to take over. Normally it would mean she would leave but tonight she stood looking out the window, giving up all pretence at doing anything other than waiting for her parents to arrive. Even though she was desperate for them to show up she wasn't sure if she actually wanted them to turn up. She didn't feel prepared for whatever would happen if they did arrive, and the nervousness felt like it was eating her stomach. Still, she gave a sigh of relief as she saw the cart pull up and her father help her mother out of the cart.

She moved to the door to greet them, opening the door wide and fixing a wide smile on her face.

"Lorelai," her father called jovially as he moved up the steps to meet her. "Lovely to see you. Lovely to be out of the house," he pivoted round and took a step back allowing Emily to step in and greet their daughter. "Your poor mother, caught my cold which then morphed into this awful flu."

"You've had the flu?" Lorelai studied her mother carefully. On the surface Emily looked exactly like she was supposed to, hair and make up perfect, navy blue suit crisp and neat, but when you looked closer you could see the how waxy her skin looked, how glassy her eyes were. "Are you ok for tonight?"

"Oh yes," Emily assured her. "I'm feeling much better now."

"She was desperate to get out," Richard protectively guided Emily into the lobby. "Nothing like two weeks in bed to make you stir crazy."

"Oh well good." Lorelai mumbled uncertainly as she closed the door and took their coats from them. "Luke's in the library." She could feel panic rising in her chest, and though it would seem that the freeze out was genuinely caused by her mother being ill, she had to check. "Dad you go through, I just need to show Mom something in the office."

"Alright," Richard gave her a jovial smile and strode off.

Lorelai guided Emily to the office behind the front desk. "This is your office?" Emily muttered casting a critical eye around the room. "It's very small. Why are there two desks?"

"One's Michel's," Lorelai told her leaning against her desk.

"Why does Michel need a desk in your office?" Emily turned her critical eye on to her daughter.

"Because he's Michel," Lorelai rolled her eyes. "It was easier to give him a desk then having to listening to him whinging."

"He's your employee Lorelai," Emily chastised her, sending a glowering look over Michel's larger and neater desk. "He should be thankful he has a job and know his place. Not take up valuable space in your very cramped office."

"Well," Lorelai swallowed. "I don't use it that much so it's fine," she exhaled sharply.

"What did you want to show me Lorelai?" Emily fiddled with the strap of her purse. "I would very much like to get on with the evening, I'm not sure how long my stamina will last and who knows when I'll get a chance to have dinner with Luke again."

"Right," Lorelai closed her eyes for a moment to bring her thoughts back on track having been thrown off by Emily's complaints about her office. "I don't actually have anything to show you. I just wanted to check that we were Ok, after what happened." Emily's mouth dropped open slightly in surprise. She squared her shoulders in awkwardness, her lips pressing into a fine line. "I didn't know if you'd told Dad about what happened so I said to come in here" Lorelai explained; nervous about her mother's posture and expression and what it could mean

"We're fine Lorelai," Emily swallowed nervously.

"It's just you didn't return any of my calls. I know Dad said you were sick. But I didn't know it was properly sick I thought it was avoiding me sick. But you've been properly sick, if you'd told me how bad I could have come and helped you out," Lorelai chewed her lip.

Emily shook her head. "I didn't want to risk you catching it and the maids for once had everything under control, it's what they're paid to do. I'm sorry I didn't return your calls, please be assured that it was nothing to do with what happened that night."

Lorelai hesitated, "You're sure?"

Emily reached forward and gently squeezed Lorelai's hand. "I'm positive."

Lorelai released a breath that she hadn't realised she had been holding. "Ok, Good."

"Good," Emily nodded her head in a way that indicated she had put an end to the subject. "I'm looking forward to proper food. All I've had is soup. It gets tiresome."

"Well you know Sookie, her food is always great," Lorelai held the door open for her mother and followed her out into the foyer. "If you'd like I'm sure she would make up some meals for you to take home with you and then just heat up."

"I appreciate the offer, but that is what I have a cook for," Emily glanced over her shoulder at her daughter as they moved through the dining room and into the library.

Lorelai sent an apologetic smile at Luke as they entered; he was sat awkwardly in the seat staring at Richard, who was sat his fingers pressed together, both men seemingly unsure of what they were supposed to be doing. Luke stood up to greet Emily, "Hello Mrs Gilmore, I'm sorry to hear you've been ill."

"Thank you Luke," Emily moved to sit beside Richard, "and please call me Emily."

"Emily," Luke nodded. "So…" he looked awkwardly at Lorelai as she sat beside her. An uneasy pause fell around the room.

"Perhaps some drinks," Emily offered the suggestion. "Or we could go through to the dining room."

"Great idea," Lorelai stood up and scurried through the doors to the dining room to the table she had specially reserved and ensured was perfectly set fifteen times before they had arrived. "Here we are,"

"It looks lovely," Richard offered as he pulled a chair out for Emily. "I think I enjoy this venue more each time I see it. You have done a wonderful job, Lorelai."

Lorelai blinked in surprise at her father's comment, it was rare that she received a complement from him and for a moment she was floored and couldn't think of anything to say.

"Though I do question the taste of those bobble head dolls," Emily spoke loudly as she placed her napkin across her lap.

Lorelai gave a sigh of relief at her mother's comment; there was something comforting in her mother's displeasure. As she sat down she caught the small smile on her mother's lips and realised that Emily had said what she had for exactly the purpose of diffusing her surprise. Lorelai nodded in gratitude, which was returned with her mother's slight inclination of her head to indicate that she was welcome. "Now have what you like, I don't know if you want 2 or 3 courses. Sook's been experimenting recently and her new menu is amazing!" Lorelai stared at her menu even though she knew what was on it having tasted every single dish multiple times as each time she ventured into the kitchen to get coffee Sookie would shove a spoon at her to taste.

"Her duck is great," Luke added as he looked down at his own menu. "And that tart thing she did the other week. The chutney relish one you brought home the other day."

"Oh that's that one," Lorelai pointed at his menu. "It's really great," she pointed the tart out to Emily on her menu.

"Well I'll have that, and the duck seeing as they come recommended," Emily smiled pleasantly at the table.

"As will I," Richard added.

"Me three," Lorelai glanced at Luke and saw his nod of agreement to the same food selection. "Ok four. Easy order," Lorelai looked up and caught the eye of the server. Who quickly came over and took their food order. "Drinks?"

"Sparkling mineral water for me please," Emily requested.

"Club soda for me," Richard ordered, at his daughter's puzzled look he glanced across at Emily. "Your mother has been warned off alcohol until she finishes her prescription, and I feel beholden to follow suit."

"Well, cheap date as well as easy," Lorelai waggled her eyebrows in Luke's direction. "You fancy sharing the recommended wine?"

"Why not?" Luke nodded and somewhat reluctantly handed his menu to the server.

With the order given the table fell into an uneasy silence as it seemed that no one really knew what to talk about. There were too many subjects that had been taboo in the past and no one seemed to know what an appropriate subject was.

"Luke," Emily finally broke the silence, her husband and daughter looking at her slightly surprised, while Luke shifted nervously in chair at the attention. "Lorelai told me that your sister now lives in Stars Hollow and that she and her husband have a young daughter."

"Doula, she's 1," Luke blurted.

Emily's eyebrows raised a fraction. "What an unusual name."

"I think Liz was pretty out of it when they chose it," Luke cut her off. "But she's a great kid, she's walking and just started to talk actual words not just baby speak." Luke relaxed slightly as he fell into a subject he was comfortable with "I reckon she'll be another bookworm, whenever she comes over she always brings a book and takes it straight to Lorelai to read to her."

"It's my youthful enthusiasm," Lorelai smiled back at him, "that and I do voices for all the characters."

"It's fun to watch. Cute too" Luke's eyes lingered on Lorelai before he remembered he was sat with her parents. "Lorelai is really great with her."

Lorelai glanced at her mother out of the corner of her eyes and waited, she could see what her mother was thinking; she could see what Emily really wanted to say. At that moment the drinks arrived and the conversation collapsed with the intrusion.

Soon after, their appetizers appeared and Lorelai used the break to ask her father about his work at Yale. It was a topic that everyone engaged with easily before the conversation became taken over by the men, Luke engaging with her father in a way that Lorelai had never seen before. Eager for it to continue she remained silent. As their plates were cleared she looked over to her mother who had remained as equally silent and was sat back into her chair watching Luke and Richard converse. It occurred to Lorelai that she had seen her mother act like this before, sitting back silently as her father talked to the person he needed to make a positive contact with. Her mother was adopting her role as the perfect corporate wife to allow her father and Luke to connect. Lorelai felt a rush of gratitude towards her mother. Feeling that she was being watched Emily turned to look at her daughter and for the second time that evening gave a soft nod of her head to signify she understood and that Lorelai was welcome.

When their duck entrees arrived the conversation once again dipped and once again it was Emily who started the conversation, this time falling on the topic of Rory's work, which once more led Richard and Luke to dominate the conversation as they discussed Rory's articles in length. Whilst Lorelai and Emily contributed to the conversation, they kept their input minimal both fearing breaking the flow that Richard and Luke had established.

As their plates were cleared away Richard finally ended the conversation as he looked across at Emily. "Are you alright Emily?" he asked her softly.

The table's attention shifted to Emily, she smiled weakly and though she smiled pleasantly at her table mates there was no denying how exhausted she looked "I'm fine, just a little tired."

Lorelai swallowed nervously at how exhausted her mother looked, a testament to how sick Emily really was as all she had done was sit and eat. "I can ask for dessert to go."

"That would be lovely Lorelai," Richard smiled in thanks as he gently took Emily's hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "I think we best get you home."

"I'll get them," Luke stood quickly and disappeared off to the kitchen.

"Thank you for inviting us Lorelai," Emily smiled at her daughter. "It's been a lovely evening."

"It has," Richard agreed as he pulled back Emily's chair. When Emily was standing he reached into blazer.

"No Dad, this is on me," Lorelai waved her hand at him to stop. "Dad, it's fine," she stopped him from protesting. "How much have you guys spent on all those schmanzy fancy Friday night dinners. One meal is nothing in comparison."

"It's not about the cost, Lorelai, you mustn't feel that you owe us anything for those meals," Emily told her quietly.

"I know Mom, that's not what I meant," Lorelai stepped alongside her mother so she could walk her out "I mean, let me treat you for a change. I mean a hamburger in a food court against Emily Gilmore's perfectly planned 3 course affairs. It hardly stacks up. A greasy burger for dishes with names that I can't say because my eighth grade French is long forgotton."

"She's teasing you Emily," Richard chuckled good-naturedly as he moved to get the coats from the Inn's coat rack.

Emily pouted slightly at being once again at the brunt of her daughter's teasing. "Why do you insist on doing that?"

"I know it's not fair when your poorly sick, but you look cute in a funny way when you're all pouty," Lorelai teased Emily further. "If I do it really bad you pull a Tabitha and that's really hilarious."

"I do not pull a Tabitha nor do I pout," Emily frowned, trying to make sure that her expression looked in no way like a pout.

Richard chuckled. "My dear girl you can pout with the best of them. Where do you think Lorelai and Rory get it from?" He held Emily's coat out so she could slip her arms inside. "Certainly not from me" Emily rolled her eyes and held her hand up like she was calling for a truce. "My dear," Richard conceded kissing her softly on the crown.

"Here you are. I got you one of everything, which is probably too much but I didn't know what you'd like," Luke joined them from the kitchen holding a white bakery box.

"No swan? This is a fancy joint Cool Hands, there should be a swan." Lorelai took the box and peeked inside. "Ooh, the Chocolate cake is amazing, eat that first."

"We are fine to be swan less," Richard took the box from her hands, "and we shall try them all."

"Well drive safe," Lorelai started walking her parents to the door. "Mom, I'm in Hartford on Wednesday for a supplier fair, I could stop by after it's done to check in if that's OK, about 4?"

Emily's face lit up, her exhaustion wiping off her face momentarily as joy flushed across her features, "That would be lovely."

"I'll see you Wednesday," Lorelai nodded and leaned in slightly. "And thank you," she flicked her eyes left and right to indicate her father and Luke.

"You're very welcome," Emily whispered back, "thank you for a lovely evening. Luke it was lovely to see you again."

"You too Emily," Luke nodded goodbye, "Richard." He joined Lorelai as she stood in the doorway watching her parents leave. When they were finally out of view in the gloom of the night he placed his arms around her waist and pulled her hip against his. "Good night, it went well. I may have even made a positive impression." he waited for Lorelai to say something but when he got no reply he forced her to turn into him. "I didn't know you had a supplier fair" he nodded his head in understanding as he caught her expression of guilt. "You know crazy lady," he kissed her softly. "One of these days, you need to tell her how you really feel."


	8. Chapter 8

**Thank you everyone for reading. Now for a little bit of Richard . Hope you enjoy :)**

 **A New Phase Chapter 8**

"Are you sure it will be alright to have dinner at the Inn?" Emily asked softly as she walked Lorelai to the front door of the house after their latest movie night.

"Mom, I wouldn't have offered if it wasn't," Lorelai rolled her eyes. "It's easier for Luke. This way he can come straight over from the diner."

"So it will be casual?" Emily interjected.

"Yes Mom, it will be casual," Lorelai ignored her mother's possibly unintentional slight.

"Alright," Emily smiled at her happily as she opened the front door.

"If you change your mind about staying over at the inn, let me know, we have a couple of rooms spare at the moment," Lorelai shoved the candy boxes in her purse, "and I'll speak to my daughter about her movie selection."

"I'm sure she was joking," Emily blushed, "or I may have picked up the wrong version."

Lorelai chuckled, "Maybe. Have a good week Mom; we'll see you next Friday."

"Goodnight Lorelai. Drive safe."

Moving out into the chill air of the driveway Lorelai gave a happy sigh as she moved towards the jeep. It wasn't one of joy at escaping just a sigh of contentment. Spending time alone with her mother wasn't something she felt he had to avoid anymore.

She waved as she sat in the car, her mother finally closing the door now she was sure Lorelai was safe in her car. Lorelai pulled out of the driveway and let her thoughts play through her mind. Next week would be the second time Luke had joined them for a Friday night dinner, he still wasn't ready to brave her parents' house and he had asked for this dinner to be at the Inn again, but even that compromise had been easy for Emily to give into. Everything just seemed to be working. Sure there were the usual snipes and gripes when lines were crossed but none of them had been anything more than that, all fixable with a quick admonishment from her mother about her maturity level or a joke about Miss Manners from her and tensions were dropped. It was nice, it was easy it was… Her train of thought froze as she caught sight of a familiar car parked around the corner from her parents' house and she turned off the road. Pulling up behind the car in question she slipped out and trotted to the driver side window and rapped the glass with her knuckles.

Her father jumped, nearly losing his place in his book.

"License and Registration please," Lorelai called as her father wound the window down

"Lorelai?"

"Hi Dad, watcha doing?" she bent down to be eye level with him.

Richard shifted self-consciously in his seat. "Well…" He placed his bookmark in the pages of the book and stared intently at the cream pages nervously, "I saw you hadn't left yet."

Lorelai stood up and studied the vista before her. Her father was not wearing his usual bow tie nor his jacket, both of which appeared to be in the backseat, he was just wearing his white shirt which if she was not mistaken bore the signs of some kind of BBQ sauce spilled down the front. Her mother had told her that Richard had been at a faculty function, faculty functions did not provide food with barbeque sauce. Traces of sauce were on the book. With a sigh she trotted around the car and slumped into the passenger seat. There was a takeout bag in the foot well. "Out with it Gilmore."

"Well," Richard mumbled again, sheepishly closing the book and studying the cover.

"How long have you been sat here Dad?" Lorelai changed tack.

"Oh not long," Richard gave her a forced smile which crumbled under her raised eyebrowed scrutiny, "About an hour and a half," he admitted softly.

"Dad!" Lorelai shook her head, "Why didn't you come in."

"It would have interrupted your evening. Your mother would have heard and she would have insisted that we all sat in the living room." He gave Lorelai a shy smile. "I didn't want to ruin the night."

Lorelai regarded her father for a few moments taking in the title of the book that he was holding knowing from her dealings with Rory's literature habit that it was not the type of book that you just picked up. "Dad did you have a meeting tonight at all?"

"Well…" he hesitated, "No," he gave her a guilty smile. Lorelai stared at him waiting for him to elaborate. Finally Richard gave a heavy sigh. "Your mother loves these movie nights, loves spending time with you, loves planning them and talking with Rory about what movies to watch and then the shopping trips to get everything."

"So?"

"So... Your evenings happen when I'm away and I'm not going away so much now that I have moved to a consultancy position within the firm. My Yale functions are mostly midweek…" Richard trailed off and looked over at her with tired eyes. "I didn't want your mother to miss out on her girls' night. They make her happy, in general she's been happier since you started to have them," he gave her a soft smile. "I like it when your mother is happy."

"Dad," Lorelai returned his expression. "That's sweet. But why sit in the car? Why not go to the club or…" she trailed off as Richard shook his head.

"Your mother would find out. Someone would mention to her that they saw me and then," he gave a mock shudder at the thought of the argument that would ensue.

"So you sat in your car? With take out?" Lorelai toed the bag at her feet.

Richard gave her a childish smile. "I did plan on going to a restaurant but when I arrived it was closed and opposite there was this barbeque take out window and we never have barbeque, your mother hates it. I couldn't resist."

Lorelai fumbled in her purse and pulled out a little bottle of Purell and held it out to her father, "well your best laid plans will get rumbled if you don't clean up." She waited for her father to clean his hands before continuing, "and blame the shirt on it being buffet and someone bumping into you."

"Good plan," Richard ineffectually brushed his hand across his white shirt, the orange stain already set in.

"Dad?" Lorelai asked carefully. "Have you done this before?"

Richard gave her another guilty smile. "Yes, the first was a genuine error, the meeting I was supposed to be attending was cancelled. When I'd told your mother I might not be out that night she'd looked heartbroken so I lied. The thought I'd created that face" he sighed "these evenings really do mean so much to her Lorelai, I couldn't spoil that for her and take it away from her."

"You are one of a kind Richard Gilmore," Lorelai softly touched her father's arm, on her father's bashful teary eyed smile she changed her tone adopting a more business-like practical persona, "Ok so next time, go to the inn, no one will tell on you, or check the restaurant is actually open, and tell me," she gave him a pointed look. "I can keep you updated one what is going on, text you when we start watching and how long the movie is, so you don't have to sit in the car."

"Alright," Richard nodded in agreement. "I might take you up on that."

"You got it. Well I'll let you get home," Lorelai reached for the door handle, she picked up the take out bag. "I'll get rid of the evidence for you."

"I'd appreciate that," Richard shuffled in his seat for a moment like he was about to lean over but changed his mind and settled back into the leather seat. "Drive safe."

"I will," Lorelai pushed open the door. "Good luck with the lying to Mom." She bent down before closing the door. "Night Dad."

"Good night Lorelai," Richard watched his daughter as she trotted over to her car and pulled away. Alone once more; he reached round to the backseat and pulled his discarded clothes forward. With an expert hand he tied his yellow silk bow tie and checked his reflection in the visor mirror. Satisfied that he would pass muster under his wife's all seeing eyes he closed the visor and started the engine so that he could pull the car the 150 or so meters into his driveway and pulled the car into garage.

The lights were low when he entered the house and for a few moments he wondered if Emily had gone up to bed already leaving the light for him so he could find his way upstairs when he came home. As he turned to go upstairs he heard a faint sound coming from the kitchen. Knowing that there was no maid in the house he quickly and quietly made his way over to the kitchen door and leant against the frame watching Emily as she stood at the sink rinsing the dishes. He smiled as he took in the scene of unusual domesticity before him, surprised by the sight of his wife doing chores and the fact that Emily had changed her clothes since he had left, changing the smart pant suit she had been wearing earlier for a more casual pair of slacks and a pale pink twinset giving her a much more relaxed and homely look. Realising Emily would get angry if she caught him watching her, Richard stepped back into the dining room "Emily are you in there?" he called walking briskly into the kitchen pretending that he had just come home.

"Richard?" Emily turned to look over the shoulder her hands still in the sink a surprised yet happy look on her face. "I wasn't expecting you home so soon." She set the plate on the drainer. "How was your evening?"

"Dull," Richard told her honestly, resting against the kitchen island behind her. "How was yours?"

"Oh, it was lovely," She set the last bowl on the drainer and pulled the plug out. "I'm sorry your evening was dull," she turned and moved to get the towel that was on the island so she could dry her hands. "What happened to your shirt?" her eagle eyes caught the orange brown stain on Richard's white shirt.

"Oh it was a buffet and I had a run in with another faculty member," Richard took the towel from her.

"Richard," Emily looked at him completely puzzled, "I need to dry my hands."

"Let me help," Richard told her softly gently taking her wrist of her still wet left hand and carefully dried it.

"I'm perfectly capable," Emily informed him with a soft voice her eyes studying him intently, "Richard?"

Richard kept hold of her hand as he set the towel on the counter and then captured her other hand raising them up so her hands were hovering over his heart, his larger hands gently holding her smaller ones tenderly. After a moment he brought her hands up to his lips kissing her fingers.

"Richard?" Emily tried again, despite her concern smiling at his tender action.

"I'm glad you had a lovely evening," Richard told her softly. "I'm glad you're happy."

"Are you feeling alright?" Emily tried to take her hand back so she could feel his temperature.

"I am fine Emily, I'm just pleased everything is going so well between you and Lorelai," he kissed her finger tips once more. "The amount of times I've seen you upset or angry after a dinner, it really makes for a lovely change. I'm happy for you both. Whatever it is that happened between you I'm glad it's worked." He frowned slightly as Emily looked away, he had learnt through their many years of marriage what certain expressions meant and the one that was currently on her face told him she had something important to say but she couldn't articulate it. Despite his wife's quick wit, rapier sharp tongue and her uncanny ability to talk at length about arts and culture with anyone, there were some topics she always struggled with namely her emotions, "Emily?" she shook her head a fraction, her head moving only enough to make her hair move with the faintest swish, "Emily?"

After an interminably long pause she gave a sad soft sigh. "I told her," Emily whispered, rationalising in her own mind that was when things had truly started to improve between her and her daughter.

"Told who what?" Richard pressed, knowing _the her_ to be Lorelai but wanting Emily to verbalise so the unspoken didn't fester.

"Lorelai," Emily answered quietly, refusing to make eye contact, "I told her about the others."

"The others," Richard repeated not catching her meaning for a moment; he swallowed as she looked up at him. Her dark eyes were filled with sadness and realisation struck him like a thunderbolt. "You told Lorelai." He looped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her into his chest hugging her tightly to him. He was surprised. Emily rarely spoke of their lost children, it was where so many of her insecurities came from, where so much of her need to prove herself and be perfect came from. He kissed her crown. He knew that Lorelai and Emily had got closer, he just hadn't realised how much closer. So much of that horrible time they had tried to shield Lorelai from because she had been so young. "I didn't realise."

"I didn't mean to, it just happened," Emily told him softly, looking up him her eyes wide as if she was scared he would be angry.

"These things often go like that," Richard kissed her softly, trying to take the scared look of her face. "I'm very pleased that you and Lorelai have got to a point where you can be open with each other."

Emily gave him a small happy nod. "We're getting there," she sighed softly. Slowly she and Lorelai were getting there.

Richard patted her shoulder comfortingly "Shall we go up to bed?" he smiled lovingly at Emily as she gave a soft nod and released his grip so she could walk. She kept hold of his hand, her small slender hand clutching his larger one in a way that showed him she still needed comfort and reassurance while she led him from the room. As they walked through the silent house she kept glancing over her shoulder at him and he sent her warm tender smiles. He was pleased that Emily and Lorelai had reached a point where they could be open with each other. For Emily to admit what she had been through to her daughter showed immense trust from his wife and he wondered if Lorelai realised the enormity of what she had been told in relation to Emily's psyche. He doubted it, as he doubted that Emily had fully explained all to Lorelai. All he knew that if the two of them watching movies together had led to his wife opening herself up he would gladly sit in his car, live in the pool house or move to Tucson. If he could facilitate the closeness that was developing between his wife and daughter by not being there he would make himself absent.

Emily finally let go of his hand as they entered the bedroom, turning to look at him with a nervous yet happy look on her face. He waited for her to speak but she remained resolutely silent before she clearly found herself unable to say what she wanted and instead moved to her dressing table to remove her jewellery. He moved to sit on the bed, conscious that she was watching him in the mirror and slowly began to undress. While his actions were slow his mind was racing trying to think of how many times he could make himself scarce without arousing Emily's suspicions. It was a tricky line to tread, but one he knew he had to because he would do anything to give Emily the one thing she truly wanted, a full relationship with their daughter.


	9. Chapter 9

**Back to just the girls, oh how far they've come oh how far they have to go, hope you like, let me know what you think x**

 **A New Phase Chapter 9**

Lorelai watched her mother out of the corner of her eye. The movie playing was not holding her interest at all tonight. Everything felt off kilter, she had been worried since she had seen her parents on Tuesday and was now completely thrown by her mother's chipper behaviour tonight given how on Tuesday her mother had looked to be two steps away from crying.

The additional Tuesday visit had been down to her father who had invited her to attend afternoon tea with them both. She had been curious as to why he had been so insistent that she attend, especially given it meant her having to spend a large chunk of her afternoon away from the Inn when she should have been working. The last time he had been that insistent that he join her for afternoon tea he had presented her with 75,000 dollars and she had wondered if just maybe she was going to be presented with another vast sum of money to do with something maturing now she was turning 40 but that had made little sense as he had kept saying them, so there was no secret to keep from her mother this time, no reason for him to be insistent she attend a random cafe. But his insistence had bordered on pleading so she had agreed and spent a bizarre Tuesday afternoon with her mostly silent parents in a dated, unwelcoming café in Hartford wondering why on earth she was there on an unseasonably cold drizzly day.

The whole afternoon had been bizarre starting with her parents had ordering her a slice of rather stale yellow cake like she was a small child, whilst they had shared a pot of tea which they had sipped at and alternated between smiling weakly at each other and looking like they had been told that cocktail parties had been outlawed. She had felt like she should make some crack to lighten the mood but there had been nothing remotely humorous that she could bring to mind. So she had resorted to counting the flowers that littered the café in the décor in a way to combat the boredom. When she had finally managed to choke down enough of the awful cake to please her parents, they had announced that they were going for a walk, which had lead them to the park across from the café. Once in the park they had walked to a bench overlooking some trees and a rockery, where they had sat silently for fifteen minutes in the fine rain while her mother had looked like she was about to cry, before they had finally led her back out of the park, had thanked her profusely for joining them and abruptly left. She had been left soaking and completely confused.

Her confusion had meant she had analysed every moment of the bizarre encounter over the last few days. The last time she had seen her parents behave that strangely they had separated, and while she hadn't completely ruled it out, the way her father had been behaving around her mother had told her it was mostly likely not that. Richard had spent most of the walk and strange stare at the rockery with his arm draped around Emily's shoulder, in a way that if he hadn't have been so tender with Emily it would have almost looked like he was mauling her. This combined with her parent's sombre demeanour had filled her with the horrifying dread that there was something wrong with her mother, beside her overwhelming love of chenille. Her mother's ebullient mood when she had arrived this evening had made her reconsider her other alternatives such as pod people, something being put in the water or some kind of mutual mental breakdown but she couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong with Emily.

"Mom?" Lorelai's voice was louder then she had intended.

Emily jumped slightly, surprised by the interruption as the movie was playing and turned to look at her with her eyebrows raised in annoyance "Lorelai?"

"Is everything OK?" Lorelai blurted.

"Beside you interrupting movie night" Emily sent her a stern look, "breaking your own rules. Yes everything is fine. Why do you ask?"

Lorelai took a deep steadying breath, "Are you sick?"

"Sick?" Emily's brow creased in confusion and cast her eyes down, checking herself over. "No I am not sick. Why do I look sick?"

"No," Lorelai shook her head. "You look great," she answered truthfully. In the past few weeks Emily had subtly changed her hair, adding more red tones to the colour and it was less structured, no longer teased for height which allowed for a soft wavy curl at the ends. It made Emily look softer and warmer, it lifted her somehow. "It's just Tuesday." Lorelai tried to explain lamely.

"Tuesday," Emily repeated.

"What was that? it kind of felt like you and Dad were about to say something but you didn't say anything." Lorelai tried to explain her concerns.

Emily's eyes widened with surprise and she leant forward to collect the remote and pause the movie. "Your father didn't tell you?"

"Tell me what?" Lorelai gestured widely. "He just called me up and begged me to come to tea."

"He didn't explain?" Emily frowned slightly.

Lorelai shook her head with an air of annoyance, "no."

"And you still came," Emily's voice softened, a look of gratitude flushing across her features.

"Yes I came, he made it sound important."

"It was," Emily nodded.

When Emily didn't expand on her comment Lorelai exhaled heavily and rolled her eyes. "Ok. Why was it important?"

"We wanted to share our visit to the garden with you." Emily told her softly, as if it explained what had happened. She inhaled deeply and tried to explain further. "We had it built so we could have a special place to go, there wasn't enough space here so your father found the park," she glanced at Lorelai, almost hoping that her daughter would have understood what she was saying so she wouldn't have to say anything else. Lorelai's face was a picture of complete bewilderment and she sighed heavily. "It's our memorial garden."

"You have a memorial garden," Lorelai stared at her mother blankly. "For who, for Gran?"

"No," Emily scowled. She closed her eyes and took a calming breath "It's for the others, the ones we lost. The five trees that surround the rockery," she exhaled her breath wobbling as she divulged information that was painful to her, "one for each. We wanted somewhere where we could go that was peaceful. We go once a year. Now that you know we thought you might like to join us."

"Oh," Lorelai gulped uncertain what to say. Beyond her mother's admittance of what had happened to her and her own concern that she was being frozen out Lorelai had not thought about what her mother had told her. She had filed away the tragic information under valid reasons why my mother is the way she is and had figured that they would never speak of it again. Clearly Emily had other ideas and now expected her to be part of their rituals. Normally forced traditions had Lorelai running for the hill, this one was different. She smiled awkwardly, it was just like her parents to not explain what had been going on but it was touching that they now wanted to include her.

"I'm glad we were able to share it with you," Emily fiddled with the clasp of her bracelet for a moment using the distraction to steady herself. She straightened her back and looked across at Lorelai, her daughter look bewildered but relieved. "It worried you? That I might be sick?"

"Well yeah," Lorelai shrugged. "I mean look what happened with Chris' Dad." The mood was getting too sombre, too personal and she forced herself to smile. "It worried me for a bit but it's kind of dumb on my part I mean I've known for years that you are going to outlive me and considering that I plan on reaching 100 you're probably in the running for Guinness oldest human."

Emily patted Lorelai's knee. "I appreciate your concern," she fixed her daughter with a curious smile.

"What?" Lorelai picked up on the smile, knowing the look that accompanied it meant Emily had more to add.

"We've come a long way don't you think?" Emily said softly. "I'm sure some years ago it wouldn't have bothered you at all if I was sick."

"Mom!" Lorelai stared at her mother in shock.

"It would of?" Emily's smile wiped off her face and she studied Lorelai intently surprised by her daughter's response. "During the years that we were…"

"Mom of course it would have bothered me!" Lorelai stared at her mother incredulously. She looked her mother up and down; Emily looked genuinely surprised at her words. "If you and Dad and had been sick like that of course it would have bothered me."

"Even though you …" Emily stopped herself from finishing her sentence by pushing her lips forcefully together. She squared her shoulders, her eyes widening and the whites of her eyes flaring. She had spent so long believing that Lorelai had hated them she had now taken it to be fact even though she longed for it to be otherwise. Emily knew her belief was doing Lorelai a disservice as no matter what had happened Lorelai was not a deliberately cruel person, it was simply 23 years of fears projecting onto her daughter which was in danger of derailing everything. Lorelai was staring at her, her blue eyes crackling with indignation her arms crossed across midriff. Emily was afraid to move afraid of what would come out if she did.

"Even if I had hated you I _never_ would have been Ok with either of you being sick." Lorelai raised her eyebrows challengingly as she studied her mother. Emily was motionless apart from her eyes that were darting back and forth. Her mother looked terrified and mortified and desperate, it was almost visible, a miasma surrounding her like her Chanel perfume. Lorelai slowly pulled her hands away from her side and held them out as a sign of a truce. As Emily's posture softened, Lorelai sank down into the couch with an air of defeat. "Besides I didn't hate you," she muttered quietly, "I thought I did but I was too young to understand what it was I was feeling. I still don't know if I understand what I was feeling back then." Lorelai blew her cheeks out and started to pick at the hem of her sleeve. This was all too much. "This country is 3000 miles across and I ran 30. I didn't hate you I was scared and confused and an unhappy square in a round world."

"I understood until that last part," Emily told her quietly as she flicked her eyes over Lorelai studying her with concern over the damage her previous statements could have made.

"Square peg round hole. Technically you and Dad should be square because I think we can both agree that I am the bouncy ball of this family, but that doesn't work for the analogy," Lorelai fidgeted as she tried to make the conversation more palatable to her. "I didn't fit. You and Dad and your world was round I was square."

"Was?"

"I have cultivated myself into shining star, can't you tell by my luminousness," Lorelai shook her head dramatically her tone light and childish. "I mean look how I sparkle."

Emily sighed as she realised that Lorelai had pushed the conversation away from the uncomfortable and onto something frivolous. "Do you think we will ever…"

Lorelai cleared her throat cutting her off "Mom I'm sorry, I'm not feeling this tonight." she glanced at the paused movie on the screen and scowled.

"Do you want to go home?" Emily asked disappointedly as she studied Lorelai. She was annoyed at herself for bringing up something she knew Lorelai would run from. "Are _you_ feeling sick?"

"No, just not in the mood for this," Lorelai gestured at the screen. "It feels too passive I want to do something active."

"You hate exercise." Emily chuckled, trying to lighten the mood

"That is very true."

"You should exercise more," Emily set the remote on the table and settled back into the couch. "It's not good for you to not exercise. The government says that you should get 30 minutes of exercise a day."

"I get plenty of exercise," Lorelai waved her hand dismissively as she reached and grabbed for one of the candy boxes. "I walk a ton and then there's…um…Luke," she grimaced. "I mean you know what they say about _that_ burning calories."

"Lorelai," Emily held up a warning hand. She was pleased that they were still talking but she had no desire to discuss her daughter's sex life.

"Sorry," Lorelai poured some candy in her mouth direct from the box. As she lowered the box and saw her mother's disapproving look. "Sorry?"

Emily forced herself to take a calming breath and think of a way to salvage the evening. With a soft sigh she fixed Lorelai with a hopeful gaze. "Now, since you don't want to watch the movie. I want to discuss the subject of your birthday," Emily clasped her hands in her lap and studied Lorelai as her daughter shifted awkwardly. "It's a big birthday."

Lorelai groaned, "It's not that big Mom. It's not a big deal."

"You're turning 40!" Emily smiled widely. "Do you have anything planned?"

"Luke and Sookie have something going on that I'm not supposed to know about. Well they've told me that they are doing something and I shouldn't ask questions. They'll be inviting you when they finalise it." She sighed. "I think Luke's told me they're doing something because he's trying to combat my FOMO thing."

"Your what?" Emily stared at her blankly.

"Fear of missing out, something Rory said, think it's a social media thingy, kind of an oxymoron though seeing as social media is just people shouting out to no one and not really that social. F O M O, fear of missing out." Lorelai babbled before shrugging her shoulder and shook out some more candy, eating it out of her hand. "It's just a birthday Mom, It's not a big deal."

"Is it not a big deal because of Rory?" Emily asked carefully as she took in her daughter's sighs and sagging shoulders. She knew Lorelai loved birthdays, festivals and frivolity; the fact that she was not excited about her fortieth birthday told Emily just how much that Lorelai was missing her daughter.

Lorelai scowled. "I've never spent my birthday without her Mom. Her schedule means she's too busy. I thought maybe I could fly out to her but she doesn't want me to miss out on the party. Which is stupid because I would rather have her then the party. She doesn't want me sleeping on a crappy motel bed for my birthday," she sighed heavily once more. "She's too stubborn, which she gets from me. Did I get that from you or Dad?"

"Your father," Emily answered simply and waited for Lorelai to finish her mini rant.

"Gilmore stubbornness, it's stupid. She's stupid. Well she's not she's Rory and she's super smart, but we knew that. I just mean she doesn't get how much I miss her and how I do not care about sleeping in a crappy motel. She thinks I want the party, which I know will be great because when are Sookie's parties not great." Lorelai burbled tiredly, not really sounding like she was talking to Emily and more just talking to herself. "But anyway, it's just a number, it's just another year and as I'm not going to be with Rory I'm just gonna be working so…"

"It's not a big deal," Emily finished for her. "Well, I think it's a big deal that my daughter is turning 40."

"Well you maybe have a different perspective on the whole thing," Lorelai gave her mother a half-hearted smile.

"I do," Emily smiled softly. "Gosh, this time 40 years ago I was so nervous. Every little twinge and ache, I was convinced was labor about to start," her smile widened, "but oh no, not you. Your predilection for lateness started in the womb. Those last weeks were so long. The waiting" she gave a mock shudder, "the worst. Except for being so uncomfortable," she tipped her head as she reminisced over the trials of being heavily pregnant, "and none of my clothes fitting. And the not sleeping and the overuse of the bathroom. I was glad when those last weeks were over," she admitted softly "mostly, because I got you." Emily fixed Lorelai with a tender loving smile. "You were such a beautiful baby. When they handed you to me it was one of the most amazing moments of my life. You looked so shocked, these big blue eyes staring at me wondering what on earth was going on. Everything just felt so right the moment I held you."

"Mom come on," Lorelai rolled her eyes again dismissing Emily's tender words. She was too agitated to deal with where her mother was taking this conversation. A glance at her mother knew she had said the wrong thing, that by dismissing Emily's admission she had hurt her. Lorelai shifted in her seat trying to think of a way to make things better. "So I'm guessing this line of questioning is about what do I want? Which in answer, no clue, not fussed." She sighed inwardly in relief as the hurt look wiped off her mother's face and an annoyed one replaced it.

"There must be something," Emily pressed her lips together in annoyance. "You should get something special for your fortieth, perhaps some jewellery?" she scowled as Lorelai gave a despondent shrug. "Lorelai! This is important. A fortieth birthday is something that should be celebrated!"

"Just get me whatever Mom. You have good taste" Lorelai sighed and slumped into the couch once more. "Ok desire to be active has gone. Can we start watching this again?" She didn't want to watch the movie but at least that meant they wouldn't have to talk.

"Well maybe we could go shopping together and you could give me ideas," Emily asked hopefully.

"Sure Mom, shopping," Lorelai picked up the remote. "But it really isn't a big deal."

Emily tipped her head in acceptance and sat back into the couch as Lorelai started the movie playing once more. A plan was beginning to formulate in her mind about how she could not only get her daughter something fabulous for her fortieth but also cheer her up and repair any damage her words this evening had caused. She smiled to herself and linked her fingers together as she gave a little gleeful shimmy of her shoulders. She had just thought of the perfect thing.


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you to everyone who is reading and those who are reviewing as well I'm so pleased you are enjoying it. Gilmore lover, the Lorelai part is coming up, I just needed to do the Emily part to break down a few barriers ;). So now the 1st part of the birthday treat. Hope you enjoy**

 **A New Phase - Chapter 10**

"Stop fidgeting Lorelai," Emily chastised her daughter as Lorelai shifted across the seat once more.

Lorelai scowled at her mother, "Well if you'd told me we were going shopping in New York rather than just saying shopping I wouldn't be fidgeting. I would have been better prepared. I wouldn't have drunk 9000 gallons of coffee this morning if I'd known we were going to be in the car for 2 million hours. Why did we need to go shopping in New York anyway? Have you bought out all the shops in Hartford or something?"

Emily flicked her eyes in annoyance and took a calming breath, "Lorelai stop being petulant. It is your 40th birthday and I want you to have something that we both approve of as a gift. I thought a trip into New York would make a nice surprise."

Lorelai looked sheepishly at her mother. "It is. I just really have to pee!"

Emily closed her eyes in distaste, "Must you be so crude?"

"Yes," Lorelai stated matter-of-factly and shifted awkwardly once more. "Because either my kidneys are about to explode or this seat is about to get really wet."

Emily rolled her eyes once more and pushed the button that lowered the screen between the back compartment of the car she had hired and the driver. "Please pull in as soon as you are able, my daughter needs to make a comfort break."

"Thank you Mom," Lorelai breathed a sigh of relief as the car pulled into a McDonalds and as soon as it came to a stop she bolted from the car.

Emily watched her daughter with mild amusement and sat back into the leather seat of the car. She found it strange to think that almost 40 years had passed since she became a mother. There had been times which felt like no time at all had passed, other times it felt like an eternity. She didn't feel old enough to have an almost 40 year old daughter; she didn't feel like she had been alive long enough herself to have a child that age. Yet here she was taking Lorelai into the city for her 40th birthday treat. There was more to the trip than just shopping but she had yet to tell Lorelai that she and Richard had flown Rory in from California. Their granddaughter had only been able to arrange a few days off and had been unable to get Lorelai's actual birthday off. So instead Emily had devised the entire weekend in New York to spoil her daughter around Rory's availability the weekend before Lorelai's birthday; something that she had managed to pull off without her daughter realising with the help of a very accommodating Luke, who had taken many a call over the last few weeks.

Emily opened her book to check her schedule for the weekend once more. She would take Lorelai shopping to get clothing for the weekend as well as trying to get Lorelai to select jewellery as a birthday gift. At 4pm Richard, who was already in the city on business, would collect Rory from the airport, which would give them time to get to the hotel before she and Lorelai returned and the four of them would go out to dinner together. The Saturday, would begin with her spoiling both her girls taking them for manicures and a spot more shopping, after which they would meet up with Richard for lunch. The afternoon was scheduled for Rory to take her mother sightseeing before they met for an early dinner allowing the day to end with a visit to the Broadway to see _The Lion King_ , which Rory had picked and which Emily was almost certain would not be her or Richard's taste no matter what the critics said. Sunday was relatively quiet in that all that was planned was a brunch in Central Park before they had to get Rory to the airport for her return flight. They would arrive back in Connecticut to have a birthday tea just the three of them before taking Lorelai home. Emily ran her pen down the page, mentally ticking off everything she needed to do to ensure each step happened as perfectly as possible. It was a busy weekend to be certain but she was sure that everything would work out well. Now that she had Lorelai the only thing that could go wrong was a delay with Rory's flight, which had been on time when Rory had called her to say she had arrived at the airport in California. She jumped slightly as the door to the car flew open and snapped shut her book.

Lorelai flopped back into the car holding a coffee cup. "What?" she asked combatively as she slid her legs in. "You can't just use the bathroom, you have to buy something."

Emily shook her head, using Lorelai getting situated to hide her book from view. "We shall be there shortly, and we can have lunch."

"I get lunch?" Lorelai gave her mother a gleeful smile. "Can we have hot dogs?"

"No we cannot," Emily wrinkled her nose in disgust. "I have made a reservation."

"You've got things planned, we're doing stuff," Lorelai grinned at her mother, her voice light and childish. "I know that face, that's the _I've-got-a-list-and-we're-following-the-list-no-matter-what!_ face. Soooo, what we doing?"

"We are going to have lunch and then go shopping," Emily answered quickly.

"Aaaaaannnndddd?" Lorelai insisted.

"And nothing," Emily shook her head, trying to bring the conversation to the end.

"Alright, don't tell me," Lorelai pouted playfully. "You know I'm just gonna bug you till we get there."

"You are turning 40 not 4 Lorelai," Emily muttered tiredly. "Please just drink your coffee and sit quietly."

As she had expected her daughter did neither, instead excitedly chattering away about anything and everything as the driver guided the car into Manhattan and they joined the queues of traffic making its way through the congested city. Finally the car pulled up outside their hotel for the weekend and Lorelai fell silent as she took in her surroundings.

"The Plaza?" Lorelai whispered. "We're having lunch at the Plaza?"

"Not exactly," Emily answered as the driver opened the door for her and she elegantly stepped out into the noise of the city. She stifled a smile as Lorelai scrambled after her, the expression on Lorelai's face one of awed excitement. "Come on Lorelai."

"Mom there are bags," Lorelai squeaked as the driver began unloading the car. "Mom are we staying at the Plaza?" Lorelai excited grabbed at Emily's arm. "Oh my god are we staying here?"

Emily smiled widely at Lorelai's excitement. "Yes we are. Now let me get us checked in." Emily swept into the lobby while Lorelai scampered along behind her. She tried to ignore her daughter as she dealt with checking in, pleased that Lorelai seemed completely oblivious to what the receptionist was saying with regards to their booking. Admin taken care of Emily led Lorelai to the lift were they taken upstairs to the room by a porter. Despite herself she couldn't help but laugh as Lorelai practically fought him to open the door to the suite, bursting into the opulent suite like a small child eager to see if Father Christmas had visited.

"Ooh Fancy," Lorelai burbled as she scanned the living room portion of the suite. "Gold. No Beds."

"It's a suite, there's a bedroom through there's a for your father and I," Emily explained pointing towards a door off the lounge area before pointing back at a door that Lorelai had run right past, "the room through there is for you."

"Dad's coming?" Lorelai asked as she moved to window to take in the view. "How long are we staying?"

"The weekend," Emily waved the porter to start unloading the bags. "The black through there please the rest in the master."

"Mom," Lorelai turned and looked at her horrified. "What about my stuff? What about clothes?"

"Luke packed you an overnight bag, so you have night clothes and toiletries," Emily explained, "we're going to go shopping. We need two new outfits for you for the evenings and casual outfits for tomorrow and Sunday."

"Happy," Lorelai grinned.

"I'm glad," Emily tipped the porter and then strode round the opulent room, pausing by the window to take in the view out across Central Park.

"So I believe lunch was promised," Lorelai bounced on her heels beside Emily.

Emily glanced at her watch, "Oh yes, we must get going. Come on, we can unpack later," She ushered Lorelai out of the door.

After their lunch, Emily guided Lorelai into the women's department at Saks Fifth Avenue. Emily's shopping expertise kicked in and she quickly scanned the floor looking for what she thought Lorelai would need. "Now we need a formal dress for tonight," Emily announced as she strode towards a display of clothing, "and something more fun for tomorrow. Though still appropriate for wearing while dining in a restaurant. After dresses, we should look at casuals." Emily selected a plain black sheath dress from the rack. "What do you think of this?"

Lorelai scanned the dress that her mother was holding, it was formal as was required, quite simple but it had an interesting neckline. It was definitely something she would choose, and it surprised her that her mother had picked it for her. "It's a great dress Mom," she caught sight of the price tag and gasped. "It's 600 dollars!"

"So?" Emily looked nonplussed and held it out to her, "Do you want to try it on?"

"Mom, this dress is 600 dollars," Lorelai shook her head. "You cannot buy me a 600 dollar plain black dress."

"Lorelai, I can buy you whatever I like," Emily fixed her daughter with an imperious stare. "Now, if you don't like this dress, we can find another," she placed the dress back in its place on the rack and moved to another designer's section. "This," she held out another black dress. "This is very you."

"It is," Lorelai nodded in agreement, taking the hanger from her mother and studying the black dress intently.

"Right, now let's try it on," Emily ordered, she reached forward as she saw Lorelai reach for the tag and tapped her daughter's hand. "Do not look at the price tag. That is not your concern." Emily stepped around the rack to look at the display. "We need that coat. That will go perfectly with this dress." She looked around the stand. "Here it is. Now fitting rooms are over there. Go try these on and I will find something for you to wear tomorrow night that's appropriate."

Lorelai did as she was told and made her way to the changing room where she quickly slipped out of her own clothes and into the dress and coat that her mother picked out. Staring at her reflection she exhaled slowly, surprised about just how perfect the clothes were for her.

"Lorelai?" Emily voice sounded from outside the fitting room. "How does it look?"

Instead of answering Lorelai stepped out of the cubicle so that Emily could see for herself. Her eyes darted to the assistant who was stood beside a wheeled rack containing a wide selection of clothes, "Geez Mom, are you related to the Flash, how did you choose stuff so fast?" she looked back at her mother. "What?" she shifted awkwardly as her mother continued to stare at her, Emily's eyes studying her with fierce intensity. "What is it? You don't like it?" she glanced over her shoulder at her reflection in the cubicle mirror. She silently cursed herself for thinking she looked good in the clothes. "I look like an idiot don't I?"

"You look beautiful," Emily told her softly. "Everything about that outfit is perfect."

"Really?" Lorelai turned to look back at Emily, who had moved a step closer.

"Yes," Emily suddenly looked away, "and there is a wrap that matches the colour of that coat which you can wear while we're eating. Well that's tonight clothing taken care of," Emily walked to the rack, "for tomorrow I thought something more summery, something that is floaty. You look so good in those floaty knee length skirts. Maybe something in a floral." She picked up a skirt to study it before putting it back on the rack in disgust. "Not that."

Lorelai looked back at her reflection and zoned out her mother's critique of the clothing she had picked and just stared. She felt like she looked amazing. The coat was the perfect green for her complexion. The dress holding her in exactly the right places. It wasn't just a dress, it was _the_ dress, the type that comes around once every few years. That one piece of clothing that seemed to be made just for you.

"Here, try this," Emily interrupted her study of herself and Lorelai jumped slightly, instinctually grabbing hold of the hanger that Emily was offering her. "You look perfect Lorelai. Beautiful," Emily told her softly her voice shaking slightly. She inhaled sharply and steeled herself. "Hopefully we can get some shoes to match that coat. Now try this on."

Lorelai nodded and stepped back into the cubicle to change out of one of the most perfect outfit she'd ever worn. An outfit that her mother had chosen for her no less.

The rest of the shopping trip continued in much of the same vein, her mother making selections of clothing and shoes, which when tried on all looked like they had been made just for her. Slightly bamboozled by this fact Lorelai didn't seem to register just how much her mother was buying for her. It wasn't until Emily was peering into the jewellery cabinet at some diamond drop earrings that Lorelai realised that the assistant who was carrying around their purchases had to be clutching in the region of $5000 worth of clothes and shoes that she finally called time on the shopping spree.

"Mom," Lorelai touched Emily's forearm. "I don't need earrings to wear tonight. My earrings are fine."

"They are very pretty Lorelai, but these…" Emily looked up and caught her daughter's expression and took the cue stopping herself from finishing her sentence. "Well, alright, maybe we don't need some for tonight. But you must choose something for your actual birthday gift."

"Mom. No. All this," Lorelai waved at the assistant. "All the other things I'm sure you have planned. It's too much. You don't need to do this."

"I want to do this. I want to get you something that you can look at when you are my age and think my mother and father gave this to me for my fortieth," Emily shook herself, seemingly caught off guard at the interruption to her shopping.

"It doesn't need to be jewellery Mom," Lorelai reasoned. "Maybe we can pick something up tomorrow, something to commemorate our trip."

"Alright," Emily conceded, she glanced at her watch, "well I suppose I should settle up the bill and we should get back to the hotel so we can get ready for tonight. Your father should be there by now."

Lorelai followed her mother as Emily paid the bill and arranged for their purchases to be delivered to the hotel with the exception of her perfect outfit for tonight which Lorelai dutifully carried on the ten minute walk back to the hotel. Emily seemed strangely nervous as they made their way up to their floor and hesitant as she opened the door. As the door opened Lorelai could hear her father's deep voice and for a moment she thought that he was on the phone until he rounded the corner without a phone in his hand. Moments later she heard who he had been talking to, the soft voice that was the most familiar noise to her. She dropped her bags in surprise and rounded the corner to where her daughter was sat.

"Rory!"

"Mom," Rory jumped up and ran to her, throwing her arms around Lorelai's neck.

"I thought you couldn't come," Lorelai whispered.

"Not for your actual birthday. I manage to wrangle a few days off." Rory stepped back and glanced towards her grandmother who was picking the discarded garment bag off the floor. "Hi Grandma."

"Hello Rory," Emily greeted her verbally, knowing that she would have to wait for Lorelai to let go of Rory before she could properly greet her. "Well now we're all here, the birthday weekend can truly begin."

"Mom," Lorelai looked up at Emily. "Thank you". Hugging Rory once more she missed her mother's nod of acceptance and the pleased look that passed between her parents. Her parents had got Rory to her, there was nothing that they needed to get her for her birthday at all.


	11. Chapter 11

**Thank you thank you to those of you who are reviewing, I'm so thrilled that you are all enjoying this so much. I hope you and the rest who are reading continue to like it. New York Part 2 ( I very nearly cut this chapter because it is almost a bit of a filler but I felt the story needed more Rory so hopefully you like it) x**

 **A New Phase Chapter 11**

Lorelai leapt from the tourist sightseeing bus onto the sidewalk with a gleeful laugh. She stumbled slightly on the uneven ground and clutched at her daughter's arm to prevent herself from falling.

"Nice trip!" Rory chuckled as she helped steady her mother. "Coffee?"

"Indeed, we need something to toast Lady Liberty." Lorelai giggled as they stumbled into the nearest coffee shop. She and Rory had probably frequented more coffee shops on their whistle-stop sightseeing tour of Downtown New York then actual tourist hotspots. The only thing they had done on this trip more than drink coffee was shop. She scanned the coffee menu board as they joined the queue. "Hmm, do I go classic or whippy frappe sugar fest?"

"We just need a jolt," Rory reined her mother in. "We've already had way too much sugar and you know we are getting a 3 course extravaganza meal before the show. We should think about getting back. It's an early dinner because of the show."

"I can't believe you convinced my mother to see the Lion King." Lorelai gave her daughter a mock round of applause.

"Well I did fancy seeing Avenue Q but I figured that would be a step too far," Rory teased. She grinned as Lorelai almost choked with amusement at the thought of Emily sitting through a musical with puppets and inappropriate lyrics. "Good thing I said that before we started drinking, huh?" Rory waited for her mother to stop laughing before continuing. "Grandma's really excited about this weekend." They stepped up to the counter, "Two Grande Americano's please," she ordered managing to hand her money over before her mother could pay. "She called me so many times trying to make sure everything was perfect."

"It's been great," Lorelai nodded in agreement, frowning slightly at her daughter paying yet again for coffee.

Rory stowed her change and looked at her mother out of the corner of her eyes. "Do you think she wanted to come with us?" she studied her mother carefully.

Lorelai look momentarily uncomfortable before shaking her head. "No. This was her scheduled activity for us. She said she and Dad had plans. I mean the poor man is going to have to re-mortgage the house with what she's spent on this weekend he should at least have some fun. Thank you," she smiled gratefully at the barista as she handed them their drinks. "Oh god! You don't think that they are having 'fun' in the hotel room do you?" she shuddered involuntarily.

"Mom!" Rory grimaced, "Grandma and Grandpa are not doing _that_. They're going to some galleries."

"Yeah," Lorelai held her door open for her daughter, "but Dad likes to score using artwork, remember the colours of Titian," she gave her daughter a pointed look as they moved into Battery Park.

"Well if there is a sock or tie on the door handle we won't go in," Rory rolled her eyes. "Come on," she tugged her mother down to the viewing area for the Statue of Liberty. "There she is."

Lorelai observed the statue across the water and grinned. "Come on kid, obnoxious tourist moment," she pulled Rory close to her and took a photograph with the Statue of Liberty in the background. "This is fun, why have we never done this before?"

"We were always either too busy or too broke," Rory reasoned and squeezed between other tourists over to the barrier so her mother could take her photograph. After Lorelai had taken enough photographs of her they switched and Rory took a couple of photographs of her mother in both sensible and silly poses. "Speaking of broke. Do I really look that bad?" she asked as Lorelai joined her. "I mean I understand that Grandma and Grandpa have more money than Scrooge McDuck and she likes to 'treat' us," Rory air quoted the word that her Grandma had used on her multiple times during the day whenever she had tried to protest at the amount her Grandmother was spending, "but she's tried to buy me a whole new wardrobe. Do I really look that bad?"

"No," Lorelai wrapped her arm around Rory's shoulder as they strode through the crowded area. "Just a bit more careworn then usual, not your usual pristine self. Besides anything less than perfection the Gilmore Gestapo will have issue with. You know how she gets." She smiled comfortingly at her daughter. "You can always say no, or use the space limit for work as an excuse."

"I tried that," Rory smiled weakly. "She just told me she would arrange extra allowance for me. You know she called my editor about me getting time off."

Lorelai froze and stared at her daughter open mouthed, "She did not?"

Rory frowned as she watched her mother's expression darken, she could see what her mother was thinking, that once again Emily was interfering trying to control things "It was fine. He thought it was funny, his grandma was the same apparently so he was cool about letting me come out for this weekend. I only missed one event which wasn't a big deal and then it's just travel for the next load of events next week which are like back to back," she added lightly explaining why she couldn't get out for her mother's actual birthday. "Plus it also made him talk about my contract with me," she smiled proudly. "If Obama wins he wants me to cover the first 100 days in office which is like through to next April. If he doesn't win, I can cover the aftermath of the election which will take me through to the end of the year. Either way I'm employed for this year."

"That's great!" Lorelai told her daughter sincerely, the fact that her mother had interfered vanishing. "I'm so proud of you!"

Rory blushed, "Thanks Mom. Ooh," she pointed a stand catching her eye, "Hotdogs. Should we I mean we'll be having dinner soon."

"Of course we should," Lorelai trotted towards the stand and ordered 2 fully loaded hot dogs, this time managing to pay for the purchase. "We should get gum," she mumbled as she swallowed her first mouthful of hotdog. "Mom will have a cow over onion breath," she grinned as Rory pulled a pack of gum out of her pocket. "Look how prepared you are. I should have put you in Girl Guides."

"Oh please," Rory rolled her eyes. "I live and work with 40 other people who are on the truck stop diet, gum and breath mints are a must." Rory took a mouthful of her hotdog using the time it took to chew and swallow to ready herself for what she wanted to bring up with her mother. "Grandma seems really happy at the moment don't you think?"

"Uh huh," Lorelai agreed as she ate and walked at the same time.

Rory continued, "Grandpa is really pleased about how happy Grandma is." She glanced sideways at Lorelai, her mother was now very interested in her hot dog. "Grandma really…"

"Is this trek going to get to its destination any time soon?" Lorelai interrupted sending her daughter a knowing look.

"I'm just pleased that you and Grandma are getting along. She always talks about you when we talk all about your movie nights even if the next one isn't for a couple of weeks. She really seems to want to please you, like will you like this or that. It's just really great that you are getting along so well." Rory gave her mother a wide smile, "It's nice."

Lorelai gave a soft sigh. "Yeah I guess." She caught Rory's pointed look and rolled her eyes. "It is. It's nice."

Rory copied her mother and rolled her eyes. She knew her mother and grandmother then closer than they had been in ages but she also knew that they were still skirting around each other. Everything was kept at arm's length, it was a lot better than the football field that used to be between them but there was still distance and she wanted them to take that final step. "I just wondered if there was anything that you wanted me to…suggest or say to Grandma. You know to keep things nice or make things nicer."

Lorelai threw the remains of her hotdog into the nearest trash can. "Rory, come on. Grandma and I are big enough and ugly enough to deal with our relationship ourselves. You don't have to play matchmaker." She sighed. "I mean if you want to suggest some films that were made in your lifetime or that were maybe made after I was 4 for movie night that would be cool, but beyond that I don't want you to get between us. Things are good right now, but you know how things can go. I don't want you to get caught in the cross fire if I screw up."

"Why would you screw up?" Rory challenged throwing away her napkin so that she could link arms with Lorelai.

Lorelai made a scoffing sound and made a sweeping gesture indicating her entire person. "I have an entire lifetime of examples."

"Maybe you're too hard on yourself," Rory mused. "I mean I know…"

"Hey uh uh," Lorelai shook her head. "This weekend is about fun, and your grandma trying to break her credit card. You need to desist with this side trip you're taking us on."

"Ok," Rory acquiesced. "But we should walk faster, because we need to get the bus because Grandma will kill us if we're late."

Lorelai glanced at her phone and grimaced as she saw the time, they weren't late but they were cutting it close. They quickly made their way up the busy city street walking to the nearest tourist hopper bus stop. Fortunately the next bus arrived quickly and they hopped on getting a seat near the door so they could make a quick exit when they reached their destination. Even though they had left the lower edge of the city in reasonably good time, with the traffic it still took them too long to reach the opulent hotel and they both gave each other an uneasy look as they reached the suite. They were late, not by much but enough that it would stress out the ever punctual Richard and Emily.

"Oh good you're here," Richard greeted them as they entered with a relieved smile. "Emily they're here." He was already dressed in his smart suit though it looked like he had managed to convince Emily he didn't need to wear his tux to the theatre.

Emily appeared from the Master bedroom, a nervous but frustrated look on her face as she finished putting on her jewellery. "You're late. Are you both alright?"

"We're so sorry. The bus got caught in traffic," Rory explained moving over to give her Grandmother a soft kiss on the cheek.

The action seemed to appease Emily as she gave Rory a warm smile and nodded in understanding. "This city is so congested." She looked past Rory to Lorelai who was stood watching them. "I laid out that beautiful blue dress we got yesterday for you. Rory the skirt and blouse we got this morning. You both look lovely in those outfits." She waved her hand shooing them into their bedroom, "Go get ready. If you need any help let me know."

Quickly the pair of them got ready for their evening before making their way back into the living room. As Lorelai expected Emily gave them a critical look, studying how they were dressed and if they were appropriately styled for the night ahead.

"So what do you think Mom," Lorelai teased holding her arms out so Emily could get a proper look.

"You look beautiful." Emily told her softly making eye contact for a beat before quickly turning her attention onto Rory. "As do you," she stepped forward and fixed a kink on Rory's hair and squeezed Rory's shoulders holding her away from her slightly so she could look at her properly "Oh you look so grown up. Stop it!"

Lorelai chuckled as she watched Rory try and protest as Emily fussed but her laughter died as Emily gave Rory a gentle hug. Lorelai took a sharp intake of breath, surprised by how her mother's attention of Rory was affecting her. It never had before and she couldn't figure why it was now. She shook her head dismissing the ridiculousness of the feeling and focussed on her father who was staring at her with a proud slightly tearful expression, "What do you reckon Dad?"

"You look beautiful Lorelai" Richard told her sincerely stepping forward and kissing her softly on the cheek. Lorelai gasped slightly and despite herself felt mildly embarrassed. Richard returned her embarrassed look and looked away holding his hands together. "Now do you girls need coats or are you alright as you are? It will be late when we leave the theatre."

"Our jackets will be fine Grandpa," Rory told him stepping away from Emily and linking arms with her grandfather.

"Well shall we go," Richard patted Rory's hand.

"Let's shall," Rory chuckled.

The pair of them strode out of the room. Lorelai looked back at Emily who was putting on her coat and checking her appearance in the mirror. "Mom? Are you ready?"

"Yes," Emily smiled warmly and tucked her clutch bag under her elbow. She followed Lorelai out of the suite and checked the door was closed properly. She smiled up at her daughter surprised by how close Lorelai was stood waiting for her and took a step back in order to achieve the proper space between them. There was a slight wrinkle on Lorelai's sleeve and she nearly reached out to smooth it away but she caught sight of her daughter's slightly creased brow and forced her arm to remain still. Just as she was about to tell Lorelai how beautiful she looked the strange sound of Richard humming a strange up beat melody punctuated the corridor and she looked towards the lift and her husband in disbelief. "What on earth?"

Lorelai shook her head, for a moment she had almost thought that her mother was going to touch her arm but something, before her father, had made Emily stop and she gave a soft sad sigh. She looked towards her father, "It's from the Lion King," Lorelai explained the melody that Richard was humming. "I just can't wait to be king. It's from the film version of show we're about to see. I guess it will be in the show tonight. He clearly did some research."

Emily looked sideways at her daughter. "My statement still stands, why on earth would he research it." She gave a resigned shake of her head. "This means he will be humming these songs for months."

Lorelai smirked, "They're by Elton John Mom, they won Oscars," she smiled at her mother's disbelief.

"Yes well, as long as he's happy," Emily shook her head once more and moved to join Rory and Richard at the elevator door. As it opened they filed in positioning themselves within the elevator Lorelai hesitated for a moment, watching as her parents interacted with each other and then with Rory, they all looked happy and their interactions were easy and sweet. For a moment she felt supremely jealous of how affectionate that her parents were with her daughter.

"Lorelai?" Emily looked nervously at her daughter as she noticed Lorelai's hesitation "Are you alright?"

Lorelai shook herself slightly and smiled widely, the trio in the elevator were staring at her, her father holding the elevator open as he studied her with concern. "Sorry caffeine crash," She stepped into the elevator

"Alright," Emily looked at her uncertainly as she stepped in. "You really should cut back on how much coffee you drink Lorelai if it causes you problems like that."

"That would not be wise," Rory shook her head as the elevator began to descend.

Lorelai nodded her head in agreement. "I would melt like you threw water over me if you cut off my coffee."

"Wizard of Oz?" Richard narrowed his eyes as he made a stab at the reference. At Lorelai's nod his face broke into a beaming smile. "Got one," he sounded triumphantly.

"What has the Wizard of Oz got to do with anything?" Emily asked mystified, looking between the Richard and Lorelai trying to understand.

"It means don't cut Mom off coffee," Rory linked her arm with Emily, smiling to show Emily her command was meant as a joke.

As the door opened Emily and Rory strode out into the lobby arm in arm. Once again Lorelai hesitated as she watched at how easily her mother and daughter interacted, she frowned as felt a stab of jealousy, confused as to why their relationship was now bothering her so much. Why their closeness was upsetting her, confused as to why she felt like a little kid who wanted her Mommy all to herself when she had never wanted it before.


	12. Chapter 12

**The final installment of the New York Birthday extravaganza. Enjoy!**

 **A New Phase - Chapter 12**

Emily opened her eyes as she heard the sound of rustling emanating from the hotel suite living room. She glanced towards the clock and read the time. 5.16 am. She blinked the sleep from her eyes and lay still for a few minutes just listening to the sounds of the morning. The most obvious sound was her husband's deep breathing as he lay beside her sprawled out across the king sized bed. It was a sound she was used to, a sound she loved to listen to, it was familiar, it was home and she hated to be without it. Beyond the windows she could hear the sound of the city starting to wake up. The rustling in the living room sounded again. She began getting out of bed, carefully extricating herself from beneath Richard's arm that during the night had come to rest on her hip. Her movement made Richard shift and she hesitated to see if he would wake. When he didn't she rose and put on her silk robe before opening the door to the lounge a fraction. She frowned; surprised to see her daughter sat on the ornate sofa. "Lorelai?" she whispered slipping through the doorway and closing the door softly behind her. Make up free with her hair thrown up in a low messy bun and wearing a pair of immature patterned pyjamas Lorelai looked so young and once again during this weekend Emily was forced to try an understand how her daughter was turning 40 the following week.

"Mom!" Lorelai looked up slightly startled, "Did I wake you?"

"No," Emily lied as she made her way over to the couch. "Are you alright?"

"Oh Yeah, I just couldn't sleep, and I didn't want to wake Rory," Lorelai took a deep breath. "Did I thank you for flying her in for this?"

"You have on an hourly basis," Emily smiled as she sat down. "We were happy to do it. It's been lovely to spend time with her. With both of you," Emily smoothed a wrinkle in her robe and gave a contented sigh. The weekend was turning out perfectly, the four of them together as a family, and best yet there had been no arguing or edge at all. They had just enjoyed spending time together. She had even enjoyed the musical the evening before despite her misgivings. "Yesterday was wonderful."

"Yeah, it was," Lorelai nodded in agreement. "I should be exhausted but I feel exhilarated. So I came out here and well you know," she indicated the room.

Emily studied the living room. The purchases they had made over the last two days were spread out across the living room in neat piles. "Not really. Why are all your things out?"

"I was just looking, and sorting a bit. You know Rory. Mine." Lorelai nodded at the piles of clothing and shoes that Emily had purchased for them during their two epic shopping sprees. Not content with the shopping spree on the Friday, Emily had bought her a further 3 outfits and matching accessories plus the caseload of clothes that Rory was going back to the campaign tour with.

"You were taking inventory," Emily frowned. "I told you…"

"I was taking stock of all the beautiful things you've bought me, and was thinking how lucky I am." Lorelai interrupted her. "I was not adding up what you spent, though I know it's a lot, and too much."

"It's not too much," Emily squared her shoulders. "We still haven't got you an actual gift for you to open on your birthday."

"Mom, you don't need to get me anything else. You've bought me 2 pairs of Jimmy Choos for god's sake!" Lorelai reasoned. "It's amazing and awesome and I can't believe how generous you and Dad have been," she smiled at Emily trying to calm her mother. "It's a little overwhelming. Flying Rory in was enough."

"Well," Emily looked nervously at her hands. "We wanted to do something memorable for your birthday even if you said it wasn't a big deal, it is to us and it's rare that I get to buy you things you actually want, or have we forgotten that crystal candlestick monkey lamp debacle," she sent her daughter an impish smile.

"I could never forget my monkey lamp," Lorelai returned her mother's playful smile. "I really appreciate all this Mom, the whole weekend so far. Rory, the restaurants, the show, the manicures and all the shopping, it's been amazing."

"But?" Emily tipped her head to the side and studied Lorelai. She hoped she looked calm but inside she was terrified of what was about to come.

"But?" Lorelai repeated looking up at her confused.

"There is a _but_ there. It's been amazing but dot dot dot." Emily pressed, anger and worry competing for top billing as she waited for her daughter to tell her what was wrong with what had so far been a wonderful weekend.

"You know you don't have to do all this," Lorelai rose slightly so she could reposition herself to be facing Emily, her expression one of nervousness. "I really appreciate it and I don't mean to sound ungrateful. You don't have to do this, buy me all this stuff."

"I want to buy you _stuff,_ " Emily hissed, her anger was rising and she couldn't understand why Lorelai was trying to dismiss her gifts.

"No," Lorelai waved her hands to stop the argument from beginning before cradling her forehead in annoyance at her own lack of ability to communicate properly. "Mom it's early it's coming out wrong, I haven't had coffee," she lifted her head out of her hands. "I mean you don't have to get me things. You don't have to prove anything."

"I'm not trying to prove anything," Emily looked at the piles of clothing in bewilderment, her anger vanishing as confusion took over as she tried to understand what Lorelai was trying to say.

"I'd rather watch movies then have stuff," Lorelai blurted. "There is probably a far better way of saying that but my brain is not awake enough to think it," she shifted along the couch so she was closer to Emily. "Something about actions and words and…" she gave a huff of annoyance. "Do you get what I'm saying?"

"No," Emily shook her head, her own mind not yet awake enough to fully comprehend what Lorelai was trying to express.

"Ignore this weekend," Lorelai waved her arm to indicate wiping a slate clear. "I know this weekend is special and different because it's my birthday. But you do this a lot trying to buy me big gifts as grand gestures, you don't have to do that."

Emily blinked still trying to comprehend what her daughter was trying to say. "I like buying you things and you hardly ever let me actually buy what I want to, we usually argue."

"I know, but you don't have to. I would rather…" Lorelai sighed heavily. "I would rather you let me break the rules about proper space and distance like you do with Rory then have things."

"Oh," Emily stared at her daughter in surprise, completely at a loss of what to say.

Before she had a chance to gather herself to respond the bedroom door opened. "Lorelai? Emily?" Richard called as he moved into the room. "Is everything alright?"

"Everything is fine Dad," Lorelai answered softly, looking away from Emily with disappointment. "Did we wake you?"

"Oh No, it's 5.30. I've woken up at 5.30 for years. It's in built into my body clock. Regardless of if I need to be awake at 5.30 or not. I wake up at 5.30." Richard moved to join them on the couch, sitting beside Emily. Seated he surveyed the piles of clothes and shoes and chuckled. "This takes me back."

"How so?" Emily looked at her husband, trying to keep her annoyance for him at bay after he unwittingly ruined the moment she had about to share with Lorelai.

"Yeah Dad. How does piles of shopping take you back?" Lorelai asked curiously.

"About this time 40 years ago, I came home from work and I found your mother sat on the floor of our bedroom surrounded by mountains of paraphernalia for a baby girl; booties, hats, little pink dresses. You name it your mother had bought it." Richard took Emily's hand and squeezed it lovingly. "Your mother was convinced you were a girl. Of course we had no way of knowing and she had already filled the nursery with all manner of things cream and white that would be suitable either way. But she was insistent. You were a girl." He chuckled once more as he looked past his wife to his daughter. "You were most active at night and your mother used to position herself against me so you could kick me too and say, ' _it's not fair your daughter is keeping me awake'_." He looked momentarily teary and looked away from Lorelai. "Anyway she was sat on the floor surrounded by all manner of things pink and pretty. She had the good graces to look momentarily sheepish before fixing me with this defiant stare and told me that our daughter deserved to look pretty. Then she pouted and held her arms up so I could help her up because she was stuck," he squeezed Emily's hand once more, "again," he chuckled as he teased his wife, "so I pulled her up and was confronted once again with just how tiny your mother is."

Emily looked at him incredulously, "I was anything but tiny."

"You were exactly the size you were meant to be my dear. I was referring to your height," he leant forward and kissed Emily softly on the cheek. "You stopped wearing heels and were suddenly 3 inches shorter then I was used to."

"Well of course I stopped wearing heels," Emily rolled her eyes at the absurdity of his comment, "and I've been the same height since I was sixteen. I'm hardly tiny, you're just tall."

"Well I'd never realised before those last few months of you carrying Lorelai the inconsistency in our height," Richard retorted. He chuckled to himself. "You know your mother was forever getting stuck when she was pregnant with you. She'd sit in chairs that were too low or too deep and she would get the sweetest frustrated look on her face. She would get stuck in her clothes and in the bath…"

"Richard!" Emily admonished her cheeks beginning to burn with embarrassment.

"Oh Emily," Richard dismissed her embarrassment and patted her knee. "Did your mother ever tell you she got stuck in the swimming pool?"

"Yeah, she did," Lorelai answered softly, slightly stunned by her father choosing to reminisce with her.

Richard laughed. "Oh I wish I'd had a camera. It was quite scandalous; eight months pregnant and she was in a two piece because she couldn't fi…"

"Richard stop!" Emily interrupted, blushing crimson, "Lorelai doesn't want to hear all this."

"Yes, well," Richard looked down at his hands suddenly seeming to realise what he had been saying. He sent an awkward apologetic look at Emily and looked at the clothes again. "I'm glad we were able to properly attire Rory, she was looking a little travel worn." He clasped his hands together. "I'm going to make coffee." He stood quickly and moved to where the coffee making facilities were in the room.

Lorelai watched her father, surprised by what he had just said, her father rarely if ever spoke about their lives as a family; if he did reminisce it was always about his school days. They never really spoke about anything personal, it was almost always work or current affairs. She glanced down at her pyjamas and frowned, she didn't think she'd even been in a situation where she stayed overnight with them and they were all sat in pyjamas. The last time she had seen her parents both in robes was when Trix died and then her father when he was sick. The last time they had seen her in pyjamas was when she had been in the hospital having Rory and before that she couldn't even remember. Yet here they were all three of them sat in the night clothes, she and her mother with no make-up on, all looking less than their best because they were all sleep rumpled. They were like a proper normal family and she couldn't remember the last time that had ever happened.

"Oh Damn."

Lorelai looked back towards her father as he struggled to get the coffee maker to work. She felt her mother get up from the couch as she continued to watch her father as he fruitlessly tried to understand what he was doing wrong. When Emily didn't move past her Lorelai turned her head and looked up at her mother who was stood hovering beside her, a peculiar look on her face. Suddenly Emily leant forward and Lorelai froze as her mother tenderly brushed a lock of her hair behind her ear. Lorelai blinked in surprise but despite her shock turned her face towards Emily's hand pressing her cheek against Emily's palm. As Emily stood up straight she gave Lorelai a shy smile. Richard swore and the moment was broken.

"Richard!" Emily admonished scurrying over to him. "Let me do it you'll wake Rory and she needs her rest."

Lorelai watched her parents with bewildered bemusement, she had never seen them so domestic before. A married couple bickering over coffee in their robes, albeit in one of the most opulent rooms she had ever been in, one which she shuddered to think was costing. They looked so normal, and her mother barefoot beside her tall father did look tiny. She smirked as her mother got the coffee maker working and sent her father an _I-told-you-so-look_ , her father holding his hands up in defeat. They were cute together, 40 plus years of marriage making them part of a matching set.

Richard kissed Emily on the forehead before excusing himself back to the bedroom. Emily turned back to Lorelai and smiled shyly once more seemingly uncertain of how she was supposed to proceed. Just as Lorelai was about to speak Emily broke the silence, looking away from her. "I've made a reservation for us to have brunch at the Loeb Boathouse," she told her quickly. "I think you should wear the skirt." Emily moved to the pile of clothes and pointed to the garment in question. "It looks beautiful on you," she picked up a cardigan. "With this. And Rory should wear the blue dress, though that might not be comfortable to fly in."

Lorelai rose from the couch and rounded the coffee table to stand beside her mother as her mother continued to chatter about the clothing and which would work for today. She was just as uncertain about what to do or say. Part of her wanted to hug Emily but the other part was telling her that was a bad idea; that the reason her mother fussing over what outfits should be worn was because Emily had crossed out of her comfort zone and was not prepared to go any further. Or maybe it wasn't that she was not prepared it was that Emily didn't know how to go further. She wondered if Emily had ever really known how. Lorelai had seen the awkwardness and the surprise when Rory had hugged her that first time at her sixteenth birthday party. Emily had admitted to her she had never been taught how to act by her own mother.

At a loss of what do to Lorelai picked up the dress she had worn yesterday evening, a pastel blue tea dress made of chiffon. It was exquisite dress and she had felt divine in it especially paired with the nude Jimmy Choo pumps that her mother had purchased for her.

"You look so striking in that," Emily commented softly, "that colour is your colour."

"Thanks Mom," Lorelai smiled, keeping her attention on the dress.

"We should get these things packed up," Emily turned her attention to the piles of clothing.

Lorelai put her dress down and moved to stand beside Emily helping her mother to fold the clothes so they wouldn't wrinkle and packing them away in the bags. She kept glancing sideways at Emily, trying to think of what to say.

"You should wear that today," Emily stopped Lorelai folding away the silk kimono style top she had in her hands "I think Luke would love to see you in that." Emily smiled softly and slipped past Lorelai to go to the coffee machine that had sounded its readiness. "This coffee smells so rich."

Lorelai nodded and resumed packing the clothes away, her mother was twittering about coffee and other small meaningless things. Her mother had given her what she wanted closeness, a moment of tenderness and because neither of them knew how to behave now they had shifted back to meaningless aloofness. She dropped the bag she was holding and marched over to her mother. Emily looked startled as Lorelai invaded her personal space. As Lorelai started to raise her arms the bedroom door opened and Richard re-entered the living room; she let her arms go slack at her side. Richard stared at his wife and daughter for a moment, taking in how close they were standing and the looks on their faces. He smiled sheepishly, but moved forward puffing his chest out with nervous anticipation over what he had just interrupted. "I'll just get some coffee and then get out of your way."

"No Dad," Lorelai hugged herself. "It's fine, don't do that. I'm gonna go take a shower," she smiled weakly at her father and moved towards the door to her and Rory's part of the suite. As she walked Emily turned to face her, her mouth open like she wanted to say something. Lorelai gently touched Emily's elbow. She gave her a soft nod and Emily nodded back an understanding wordlessly passing between them. Lorelai's smile warmed. She and her mother couldn't express what they wanted to say in words yet or come straight out and hug each other, but they were moving in the right direction. Slowly but surely they were moving to that point.


	13. Chapter 13

**Thank you everyone for reading. Time for a little bit of a Stars Hollow birthday bash. Also I googled Halmoni for Grandma, so if you're Korean/know Korean, and I got it wrong, please can you let me know :). Hope you enjoy, let me know x**

 **A New Phase - Chapter 13**

Lorelai jumped as someone released a party popper over her head her hand went to her chest as her heart started to pound and she tried to stop herself from cringing. She hated those things. Sparklers and streamers and all manner of other party decorations she adored but those stupid little plastic tubs that cracked so loud and sprayed horrible stringy paper over you she hated. She knew Luke wouldn't have got them. She cast a look over her shoulder but the perpetrator of the latest popper incident had vanished. Beside the annoying poppers her 40th birthday party was amazing. Luke and Sookie had outdone themselves. Miss Patty's hall had been covered in twinkle lights and balloons and it seemed like half the town had shown up necessitating the party to spread out of Miss Patty's grounds and into the street. The music was loud and cheerful and people were dancing and laughing. Hep Alien were playing sporadically throughout the evening replacing the piped in music with raucous sound that everyone was enjoying. It had surprised her when her parents had shown up; it had surprised her further that her father was now talking in depth with the band about musical instruments. Never would she have thought she would have seen her father talking let alone enjoying talking to people who looked like Zack and Gil with their long hair and tattoos and rock and roll clothing. But he was there laughing away.

Other than greeting her mother Lorelai hadn't seen her, Emily had disappeared into the crowd though Lane had assured her that she had seen her talking to her own mother outside where Mrs Kim was minding a mini crèche had been established for all the small children whose parents hadn't been able to find babysitters. The sight of her mother being mauled by sticky fingered probably crying babies and toddlers was too much to miss, but she had yet to make her way outside as every time she tried someone else would grab hold of her to wish her happy birthday or pull her in to dance.

She had barely seen Luke at all; he was stuck out on the grills serving food with Cesar as with the number of guests the food station was just so busy. It was one of the only downsides of the party that he had to work, that she couldn't spend time with him.

"Lorelai," Taylor grabbed hold of her arm and fixed her with an annoyed stare. "I told Luke that this party was to be confined to Miss Patty's only."

"Taylor it was a semi surprise party, speak to Luke. I know nothing of the arrangements all I knew is I was getting a party," Lorelai scowled at him, annoyed that the man was trying to put a dampener on her party.

Taylor ignored her scowl. "Yes well, Luke in his surly way told me…"

"Mr Doose, excuse me," Lorelai jumped slightly as her mother appeared from nowhere to stand beside her. "I need to borrow Lorelai for a moment, her father and I shall be leaving shortly and I need to give her her gift."

Taylor opened his mouth as if to protest but upon seeing the look in Emily's eyes despite the smile on her face, gave a meek nod and a scurried off where he was immediately pounced on by Babette.

"Thank you," Lorelai whispered to her mother, stifling a smile as she watched Babette lay into Taylor over bothering her.

"I do have to give you your gift," Emily told her softly as she held her hand out to indicate to Lorelai she needed to go outside. "It just seemed like a very opportune moment, seeing as you were trapped by that officious little man."

"Taylor's not that bad," Lorelai tried to defend the Town Selectman. "Small town charm and all that."

"Oh no," Emily ushered her down the steps, "the tiny loud woman you live next door to…"

"Babette."

"She has small town charm. That simple boy that Luke's befriended…"

"Kirk."

"He has small town charm," Emily frowned, "but Mr Doose, is…"

Lorelai stifled a laugh as Emily completed a fairly accurate character assassination of Taylor. As her mother walked her across the street she looked towards Luke behind the grills. He caught her looking and raised his arm in acknowledgement. Lorelai waved back smiling happily at him. He returned her warm smile.

"Lorelai, are you listening?"

"Sorry what?" Lorelai turned to look at her mother. They had come to a stop outside Luke's and Emily had clearly finished discussing Taylor and moved on to something else. "Sorry Mom, what did you say?"

Emily looked past Lorelai to the grills and the back at her daughter, a soft smile of understanding on her lips. "We need to go into Luke's," Emily told her softly.

"You left jewellery at Luke's? It's been open so people can use the bathrooms," Lorelai looked at her mother surprised.

"It's not jewellery," Emily led Lorelai into the diner changing the sign on the door so CLOSED was displaying. "Well, there is some jewellery. Sit," Emily pointed to a table while she went behind the counter, "but that's not really your present."

"You got me jewellery that's not a present?" Lorelai sat at the indicated table.

"It's not really a birthday present because I bought one for Rory also. Those charm bracelets you both got so excited over," Emily explained. "Your father will give it to you later."

"You called them insipid and tasteless." Lorelai pointed out watching her mother curiously as Emily bent down behind the counter and then stood up again.

"Well they are quite charming…"

"Ba dum bum," Lorelai interrupted, as her mother raised her eyebrows, "because charming…and their charms…no?" She looked suitably chastised and Emily rolled her eyes in mock annoyance, though the faint smile on her lips gave her away. "So Dad thinks you've got me jewellery."

"Well no," Emily rounded the counter. "Your father and I spoke about what you said about the trip and we agreed that the trip is your gift. I went back to the store when you and Rory were sightseeing and bought the bracelets I just forgot to give them to you and Rory with all that was going on." She placed a large pale blue gift bag on the table in front of Lorelai, her fingers spruced the white iridescent ribbon curls before she stepped back and pulled out a chair to sit. "This is from me."

"From you?" Lorelai's eyes flitted from her mother to the bag and back again. Emily was sitting perfectly still, her face mask like but there was something in her mother's dark brown eyes that made her nervous about what she was about to open. Carefully Lorelai reached into the bag and pulled out a white gift box made of shiny card. She set the heavy box down on the red table and looked across at Emily who was still motionless. Lorelai swallowed and lifted the lid of the box away placing it to one side. "Oh!" she sounded in surprise. Inside the box was a large square book nestled in white tissue paper. The book had a cream linen cover which was embroidered in shades of blue and silver with images of dragonflies and swallows. Carefully she lifted the book out to study it, her fingers tracing the embroidery. "It's beautiful."

"Open it," Emily urged quietly.

Lorelai did as she was told, carefully placing the book on the table and unlacing the cream ribbon from the silver toggle that held the book closed. She gasped as she opened to the first page; a picture of her and Rory attached to the heavy cream paper, the photograph showed her and her daughter from behind walking arm in arm; their heads thrown back in laughter as they strode along a street in New York. She turned the page and found more; pages of pictures of her by herself, with Emily, with Richard, with Rory, combinations of the 3 of them and pictures of the 4 of them seated around tables smiling at the server who was taking the photograph. Interspersed with the pictures were tickets stubs and tourist brochures of the places they visited and the hotel. The book was a perfect memento of the trip they had shared. She turned to the last double page, on the left side was a photograph that Richard had clearly taken; a picture of Rory, Emily and her stood next to each other looking out over the boating lake by which they had eaten brunch. In the picture she was smiling widely her arms flying in the air while Emily and Rory were laughing. On the facing page was a piece of paper cut from her mother's day planner, a list of everything that happened that weekend written in Emily's neat looping handwriting. At the top of the list in block capitals that were almost calligraphy the words _Lorelai's 40_ _th_ _Birthday Trip_. On the final page was a picture of her blowing a candle that had been placed into a fancy dessert. Her eyes were dancing, she looked happy and beautiful in the outfit that her mother had picked for her. "Mom," was all she could manage to say as she returned to the front of the book and started to look through all the photographs again.

"Do you like it?" Emily asked nervously.

"It's beautiful," Lorelai found her voice as she continued to stare at the photographs. "It's perfect, it's…I can't believe you had this made for me," out of the corner of her eye she saw Emily shift awkwardly, suddenly looking down at her hands. Lorelai looked up at her, her head moving back and forth between the book and her mother. "Mom did you make this?" Emily looked up, she was smiling nervously and she gave a small shy nod. "You made this," Lorelai whispered, staring intently at the pages. The book looked professionally crafted. "You made this for me," Lorelai whispered once again, at a loss of what to do or say. She had in her hands one of the most personal and meaningful gift she had ever been given. It was so unlike anything she had ever received from anyone let alone from Emily whose gifts usually consisted of ornate over the top trinkets that she never wanted. Yet the book in her hand was something that she loved and would treasure. It was a mixture of Emily's want for her to be able to remember the weekend decades down the line and her request for proper distance to be dropped. It was a poignant reminder of the weekend when they were a family. When they enjoyed spending time with each other. "Mom, it's amazing…

"There you are," Sookie burst in. "Oh Hi Emily," she obliviously called brightly as she scurried across the diner. "It's time for your cake sweets, we need to blow out the candles and get it cut so people can take a piece." Sookie saw the book, "Oh, look at that, don't you all look pretty." Sookie peered at the page that Lorelai had open, "Lorelai told me all about your fancy trip it sounded so magical."

"Sookie!" Luke barked as he appeared at the door.

Sookie looked momentarily stunned at his sudden appearance and the anger in his voice. "I was just getting Lorelai so she could blow out her candles."

"Candles can wait a few minutes," Luke scowled and held the door open. "Out."

"But!"

"Out!"

"No Luke, it's Ok," Emily got up from her chair, she sounded tired and defeated. "Lorelai should blow out her candles, she likes birthday candles. And I'm sure Sookie's cake is delicious," she smiled weakly at Sookie as she moved towards the door.

Lorelai watched her mother leave, her heart sinking through her torso. She hadn't said thank you, she hadn't thanked her mother for the album.

"Did I do something wrong?" Sookie asked, her voice high, filled with concern.

"No, it's OK Sook," Lorelai smiled weakly and began to put the book away in its box. "Why don't you get the candles lit, I'll be over in a minute Ok."

"Ok," Sookie looked uncertain between Lorelai and Luke but did as she was told, quietly leaving the diner her eyes fixed nervously on Luke scared that he might yell at her again.

"Sorry," Luke muttered from his place at the doorway.

"Not your fault," Lorelai shrugged and slid the box into the bag.

Luke watched her quietly, waiting for her to speak, waiting for her to break the silence and voice her annoyance at having her moment with her mother interrupted. "You'll catch her before they go."

"Yeah," Lorelai muttered tiredly as she stood up. She lifted the bag and moved towards the counter.

"I got it," Luke took the bag from her. "I'll make sure it's safe." He took a step backwards and opened the door for her. "Go greet your public."

Lorelai gave him a weak smile as she passed by him. Out on the street the noise went up several decibels and she moved towards the dance studio. Hep Alien had picked up their instruments and there was a large orange glow that Lorelai made her way towards, realising that it was coming from her cake. Her smile widened despite her disappointment. As she stepped up onto the grass the band began to play happy birthday and the crowd began to sing. Lorelai stopped beside the cake; a 4 tiered chocolate masterpiece covered in multi-coloured sugar flowers.

"Wow that's a lot of candles," she mumbled to Sookie as her friend excitedly pulled her close. The crowd finished singing and burst into applause as she made an attempt to blow out the candles on the lower tier of the cake. It took her 5 breaths to get the whole cake which earned her another round of applause. "Well," Lorelai smiled around the crowd, "Thank you for coming everyone. And as they say Let them Eat Cake." She leant forward and took the large knife that Sookie was holding and handed it to one of the Inn's kitchen staff. "You cut," she instructed him, "you hand out," she instructed Sookie.

The crowd began to pull itself into a semi orderly queue in order to get some cake. Lorelai moved away from the cake, seeking out her father who towered over the majority of the crowd. He gave her a beaming smile as she approached him. "Dad."

"Happy Birthday Lorelai," Richard leaned in a kissed her softly on the cheek. "Lovely party."

"Thanks Dad," Lorelai smiled up at him.

"Your mother wanted me to give you this," Richard reached into his pocket and handed her a large white jewellery box. "We managed to go home with it in error, another something from the trip."

Lorelai took the box. "Thank you Daddy," she opened the box and studied the charms threaded on the silver snake chain that her mother had chosen for her; 3 in total, her initial, one saying Mom, one saying daughter. None of the fun hobby charms that she and Rory had liked, just simple and pretty charms that her mother could approve of despite her distaste for the style of jewellery.

"Very charming," Richard chuckled.

"Ba dum bum," Lorelai felt the need to respond appropriately to her father's joke. "Is Mom…"

"Lorelai," Emily appeared holding two pieces of cake wrapped in napkins. "We are going to make a move, it's getting late."

"Yes," Richard took the cake from Emily. "It is."

"It was a lovely party," Emily fiddled with the strap of her purse.

"Mom," Lorelai touched Emily's elbow. "Thank you…for coming…for the book."

Emily shifted awkwardly, "You're welcome."

Lorelai grimaced, there was so much she wanted to say, so much she wanted to express about how much the book meant to her. But she couldn't. The moment had been snatched away from her, from both of them, once again. She couldn't do it with an audience, even if the audience was her father. "It's really beautiful," was all she could manage. Her mother nodded at her and turned away moving towards the car. Lorelai gave her father a weak smile which he returned with concern in his eyes before forcing a cheery expression on his face and thanked her once more before moving to catch up with Emily who had moved away with surprising speed. Lorelai wrapped her arms around her waist and stomped her foot childishly, mad at herself for not being able articulate how she truly felt to her mother.

"Lorelai?"

She forced a smile on her face and turned to face Lane, the young woman had one of her boys on her hip. The one year old's hair was pulled into a faux Mohawk, while he wore ripped jean shorts and a black vest with a picture of a guitar on. He looked so adorable that despite her mood Lorelai's smile turned genuine.

"You OK?" Lane asked stepping up onto the curb.

"I'm good," Lorelai smiled, tickling the baby's bare feet. "Which one is this, I still can't tell them apart."

"Kwan," Lane bounced her son. "Steve has a drum on his vest because he likes to bang Mommy's drums. Do you wanna hold him?" She pitched her hip forward so Lorelai could take the small child and cuddle him close. "I just wanted to check, is everything Ok with your…" she trailed off. "Or should I not ask?"

"Nothing wrong with them," Lorelai shook her head as she rocked from side to side with the little boy on her hip. "Just me not being able to say the right thing."

"You'll figure it out," Lane smiled at her. "The only person I know better with words then you is Rory. Zack said we should get you to help with lyrics."

"Oh you so don't want that. I have zero musical ability," Lorelai shook her head dismissively, bouncing Kwan as he started to grizzle.

"Ok," Lane reached out to take her son back. "Lorelai, you know if you ever want to talk to me you can right. I know I'm not Rory, but I get the whole being a daughter thing," she gave a sheepish smile. "Well I better get this one back to his Halmoni, Mama is going to take the boys so we can carry on playing longer. Well at least until Taylor cuts the electric off. Say bye bye to Auntie Lorelai Kwan, say bye bye," The toddler waved and Lane made her way back over to the party.

Lorelai watched the young woman go and sighed heavily, surprised and touched by Lane's offer. The only trouble was that now everything she thought she knew about being a daughter no longer made sense. She no longer felt like they saw her as a failure or a disappointment. All the boundaries and walls she had built up during her life about her parents where crumbling and falling apart. All she knew that there was one thing that she wanted to say and she had no clue how she was supposed to say it.


	14. Chapter 14

**Well happy trailer day everyone! I am now officially way too excited. we have to wait a whole month. Also EMILY WEARING JEANS! I just can't. They better hug in the revival because she is so not ok! But then it's not surprising but I think we will all need many boxes of tissues.**

 **Anyhoo back to the matter at hand. Penultimate chapter, Hope you all enjoy it. Thank you for reading. x**

 **A New Phase - Chapter 14**

Lorelai sighed heavily once again. She shifted her hips trying to find a comfortable position, she was agitated, her legs fidgety. Failing to get comfortable yet again she lifted her head so she could smash it down on the mattress in frustration.

She grimaced as she heard Luke mumble something that resembled her name into the mattress. He rolled over still half asleep and lay still with his arm stretched out. Lorelai wriggled into position, placing her head on his shoulder and positioning his arm around her, holding his hand tight.

"What is it?" Luke mumbled, kissing her on the crown.

"I can't say it, I can't tell her" Lorelai sighed despondently "Why can't I say it?"

"It will come when it's ready," Luke reasoned, his eyes trying to close as he fought sleep.

"Did you know what she was going to give me?" Lorelai asked, her thumb stroking his hand.

Luke shook his head. "She just asked if she could use the diner," he sniffed and opened his eyes. "Easier to keep Emily Gilmore happy with me if I say yes. Nothing she's asked for so far seems crazy so," he shrugged sleepily.

"It's beautiful Luke, its perfect like the Mona Lisa of gifts, and all I managed was…uggghhh. Why can't I say it to her?" Lorelai kicked her legs in frustration.

Luke tightened his grip around her. "You guys have said lots of things. Maybe words don't work for you guys maybe you don't need to say it. Just show it."

"I don't know how."

"You'll figure it out," Luke kissed her once more. "You always find your way around these things," he yawned. "Try sleep, we can talk about it more tomorrow, we'll work it ou…" he drifted back off to sleep before he could finished his train of thought.

Lorelai sighed and nestled into him, tucking herself around him, making herself feel safe and comfortable so that she would hopefully drift off to sleep. But she couldn't, even with the soft thump of Luke's heartbeat in her ear she couldn't fall asleep because her mind was working too fast, going over not just the night before at the party but so many different aspects of her life and her relationship with her mother. She didn't want the only time she hugged her mother to be when her mother was a sobbing mess. She couldn't let it be. She always did this, always, got so far with someone and then ran away and if felt like she was doing that with Emily. Except she didn't want to, she wanted to be closer to her mother, wanted everything to be Ok, wanted to not be the disappointment, wanted after 40 years to finally be able to communicate with her mother.

She closed her eyes and tried to block out her mind but nothing was working to quiet her thoughts. She opened her eyes once more and watched the shadows on the wall of Luke's apartment. They changed as dawn broke. She closed her eyes and pretended to sleep hoping that pretending might turn real. She stayed still as Luke rose early so he could meet his delivery guy. When Luke left for downstairs she got up and paced. It was too early to do anything but she felt like she needed to something.

Eventually she got dressed and threw her hair into a messy ponytail. As she made her way downstairs she could hear Luke getting ready for the day. She wordlessly fixed herself some coffee holding the paper cup like it was the Holy Grail and could provide her answers. Luke seemed to sense that she wasn't ready to talk so silently went about his business as he opened up the diner and started to serve the early morning crowd.

Feeling eyes on her Lorelai moved to sit in a stool by the counter. It felt like everyone in the diner was watching her. The feeling was making her feel even more anxious and fractious. As she finished her coffee Luke stopped in front of her and studied her with concern "I have to go. I'll see you later," Lorelai mumbled after a time.

"Ok," Luke tenderly squeezed her hand.

She smiled gratefully to him as she left the diner, thankful that he wasn't pushing her to explain what she was doing, because she wasn't really sure herself. Without really knowing what she was doing she made her way to her car and pulled away driving towards the highway.

Her unplanned drive meant that she was caught in rush hour traffic especially as she entered Hartford and she found herself getting angrier and more agitated as she stop started her way through the city to her parents' house.

As she pulled into the drive she still didn't know what she was going to do or what she was going to say but she knew that she had to try, regardless of if there was a maid in the house or if her father was home. She had to try and tell her mother. She had to make her mother understand.

She rang the doorbell and smiled weakly when a maid who she actually recognised opened the door. The young woman smiled pleasantly as she let her in and pointed to the left of the doorway to the table where Emily sat writing.

"Mom!"

"Lorelai!" Emily looked up from her writing surprised. Her eyes swept across Lorelai, taking in her rumpled make up free slightly frazzled appearance. "What's happened? Is it Rory? Is Rory alright?"

"Rory is fine," Lorelai stood at the side of the table. "I need you to stand up."

"What?" Emily stared at her in confusion.

"Stand up." Lorelai stated. "Mom, please stand up. I need you to stand up," her voice was rising, anger and desperation creeping in. "Stand-up," she grabbed at Emily and tried to pull her mother upright.

"What on earth?" Emily stumbled to her feet. "Lorelai? What are you doing?"

"Mom!" Lorelai held her hands out to get her mother to stop. "I can't say it, I don't know why but I can't I don't know if it's….I don't know. But that book, Mom, that book says it, you can say it and I know. But I don't know if you know. Do you know?" she looked desperately at her mother, but Emily was stood looking at her like she was crazy. "Mom, you know right? You know …please tell me you know," she lunged forward and threw her arms around Emily, she was too forceful and she could feel her mother bounce within her grip, feel the air being pushed out of her mother's lungs by the force of her grip. Lorelai held tight, the grip not really a hug but all she was capable of managing. After what seemed like the longest minute she felt her mother's hands on her back. The touch made tears spring in her eyes and she started to cry, her tiredness and her racing mind, the confusion about how their relationship had changed and what it meant now and what it meant she had missed in the past tumbling down her cheeks in big fat tears.

Emily pushed out of her grip but kept hold of her arm and pulled her towards the stairs leading her upstairs to the top of the house, to the den, to their room, to the space where they could honest with each other. Emily forced her to sit in the couch and then sank down beside her, her hand coming to rest in the small of Lorelai's back where she moved it in slow soothing circles while Lorelai continued to cry.

Eventually Lorelai's tears dried out and she sat up a little, the crying had cleansed her head and she felt stupid and ridiculous.

"I know Lorelai," Emily told her softly her hand stayed on Lorelai's back still moving in the slow and soothing way.

"You do?" Lorelai spluttered she turned to look at her mother. Emily looked tearful also but was keeping herself together "I can't say it. I don't know why but I can't, I want to but I can't."

"You're scared I'll make you feel bad," Emily repeated the words that Lorelai had once said to her. "You very rarely say those words to anyone. To admit you love someone requires you to be open with the other person. We've never really been open with each other." Emily removed her hand from Lorelai's lower back so she could wipe the tears from her daughter's face. She smiled as Lorelai didn't shy away from her. "But I know you love me, and I hope you know I love you." Her smile gained strength as Lorelai gave a tearful nod. "Just because we don't see eye to eye, or that we say unkind things to each other, it doesn't mean we don't love each other. We just express what we feel differently. I've never been any good with saying it either."

"It's stupid," Lorelai mumbled, wiping her face with her sleeve, "I feel stupid."

"It is stupid but you aren't," Emily frowned as Lorelai continued to mop her tears with her sleeve. "Don't do that," she pulled Lorelai's hand down. "I'll get you some tissue," she rose and quickly left the room returning moments later with a roll of toilet paper. "Here you are," Emily sat back down and waited for Lorelai to dry her face.

"How do we fix it?" Lorelai asked, picking at the tissue that she had just used. "I don't want the only time we talk properly to be when we're both crying messes."

"I don't know Lorelai," Emily answered truthfully. "I think we both have to just keep trying. Keep having our movie nights and spending time together. Eventually we will find our way."

"I guess," Lorelai shrugged she felt drained and exhausted. Now that she had cried it all out she felt deflated and unsure what to do or say next. "My head feels all mixed up."

"You've had a lot going on," Emily sympathised. "Rory not being around, your divorce with Christopher being finalised, putting your life together with Luke plus all that goes on in your usual busy life. That's enough without working on our relationship."

"It's worth working on it," Lorelai mumbled shredding the tissue in her hand.

"Stop picking at the tissue, you're making a mess," Emily admonished reaching to take the shredded tissue and setting it on the coffee table. "And I agree, it is worth it," she smiled, getting no response from Lorelai she fixed her daughter with a serious stare. "Now. What would you like to do? Have you had breakfast?"

"I'm not hungry," Lorelai shrugged, she had no idea what she wanted to do, her brain was frustratingly blank.

"Well," Emily straightened herself slightly and glanced at her watch, "I don't have to be anywhere until noon, it's only 8.45 now. Would you like to watch a movie?"

Lorelai's head snapped round to her mother in shock, "during the day? But we're not sick."

Emily bent in low like she was whispering a great secret. "I think we can make an exception," she brushed a stray strand of Lorelai's hair away from her daughter's face "hmmm, you're not yourself, you're certainly not my happy little girl. We can make an exception for that."

"Ok," Lorelai nodded, a surprised happy smile playing on her lips.

"I don't have any candy, but I can get coffee and there will most likely still be pastry left over from breakfast. I doubt Jennifer has thrown it away yet," Emily patted Lorelai's knee. "How does that sound?"

"Good," Lorelai nodded she felt her mood lifting, she didn't feel hungry, but maybe some sugar would help her to feel better.

"Good," Emily parroted. "You pick a movie, I will be back shortly."

Lorelai watched her mother leave and then slowly made her way over to the cabinet that housed the DVD's there were more than their last movie night and she recognised a lot of the new titles as once that she and Rory had discussed during their New York trip. Many of them were not movies that she thought would be to Emily's taste, but it was touching that her mother had made note of them all. She selected 3 movies unsure what her mother would want to watch and laid them out on the coffee table.

With nothing else to do but wait she curled up onto the couch and looked around the room. She noticed there were new photographs in the room. Photographs from their trip. One caught her eye and she couldn't help but smile. It was a photograph that Rory must have taken of her and Emily staring longingly at an out of sight pair of shoes. Their expressions were almost identical, she rarely looked like her mother as she took after her father and the Gilmore line with their height and blue eyes, but every once in a while she could see her mother in her. She was glad Rory had managed to capture the moment.

Emily entered with a tray holding a pot of coffee and a plate of Danish which she set to on the coffee table. She studied the three DVD cases and deducing that she was meant to pick, chose the movie she wanted to watch and moved to get it running. With the movie playing she ensured that Lorelai drank some coffee and had a few mouthfuls of Danish, ignoring the mess that her daughter was making as she was just pleased that Lorelai had eaten something. When Lorelai had drained her cup the younger woman shifted back and forth on the couch trying to find a comfortable position. Emily watched her before she removed her hands from her lap and reached out to Lorelai, coaxing her to sit closer to her. Lorelai complied and nestled in beside Emily, after a moment Lorelai rested her head on her mother's shoulder and her hand fell across Emily's lap in a vague imitation of a hug. Emily wrapped her arm around Lorelai's shoulder holding her tightly while her other hand took hold of the hand in her lap.

"Thank you Mommy," Lorelai whispered.

Emily squeezed her daughter's hand in response. Lorelai smiled, she was beginning to feel more human now. She wasn't sure if it was the coffee or the sugar or the hug or a combination of the three. As messy and confusing as this morning had been, this moment made sense. They would be OK. Right now she would settle for OK. She …they just had to keep trying. They would work on this together, they would get there together.


	15. Chapter 15

**And so the final chapter. What started out as a two shot has grown somewhat , so thank you for sticking with it. I hope that you enjoy this last part Let me know what you think :)**

 **A New Phase - Chapter 15**

Emily looked up from her work with surprise as the doorbell rang. She was not expecting anyone, nor any deliveries. Alone in the house as the maid had just left for the grocery store Emily moved to open the front door. She smiled in surprise and delight as she saw her daughter. It had been 3 days since Lorelai had burst into the house in her frantic emotional state. After the morning of watching a movie and calming down, Lorelai had gone home and that had been the last that Emily had heard from her. A lack of contact from Lorelai was typical and despite the fact that Emily had been agitated over her daughter's wellbeing she knew from experience that Lorelai had to be the one to get back in contact; else she be accused of butting in. Instead to alleviate her agitation Emily had spent the last three days planning a function. The dining room now bore the fruits of her work. The table littered with invitation samples and pictures of floral arrangements. Lorelai's appearance made all that insignificant.

"Hi Mom," Lorelai greeted her brightly.

Emily stood back to allow Lorelai into the house, she could see how nervous her daughter looked and despite the brightness of Lorelai's tone hear the underlying anxiety. "Hello Sweetheart," Emily greeted her. Lorelai seemed to freeze and Emily tried to remain calm wondering what was about to happen.

"You…" Lorelai mumbled before finally seeming able to find the use of her feet and moved into the foyer. Emily closed the door behind her and gently clasped her hands together waiting for Lorelai to explain her visit. "You…you never called me that before," Lorelai whispered after an awkward moment of silence.

A wave of confusion passed over Emily which was quickly replaced with realisation that she had greeted Lorelai as _sweetheart_. "Not recently, no," Emily admitted softly, blushing slightly at how easily the long ago habit had come back without her realising it. "I used to call you it all the time when you were little."

"Oh," Lorelai mumbled softly, she cast her eyes downwards to the box that was in her hands.

"Do you want some coffee?" Emily asked softly.

"Please," Lorelai gave a mumble as she nodded.

"Alright, Go sit, get comfortable." Emily indicated towards the living room. "I'll be a moment," she quickly made her way into the kitchen and made up a tray of coffee and wafer cookies. She could feel the nervousness bubbling in her chest, she was worried what was about to happen. An anxious Lorelai rarely meant something good.

Forcing a smile onto her face Emily moved towards the living room. Lorelai was sat with the shoebox on her lap staring intently at the pattern on the lid. "Here we are?" Emily adopted the same bright tone that Lorelai had used. She set the tray on the coffee table. As she straightened she hesitated wondering where she should sit.

"Mom," Lorelai whispered and tipped her head slightly towards the space beside her on the couch.

Emily's smile relaxed and she sat down beside Lorelai. When Lorelai didn't speak further Emily turned her attention back to the tray pouring out two cups from the pot. She held one out to Lorelai.

Lorelai shook her head. "In a minute I need to do this first."

"Alright," Emily placed the cup back on the tray and sat back into the couch. Lorelai's quietness making her feel that she shouldn't be holding a cup of hot coffee while her daughter managed to say what she was clearly struggling with.

"I had an idea," Lorelai mumbled quietly. "I've been thinking a lot the last couple of days. About everything you said, and something that Luke said, about maybe because we can't talk we should show." Her hands reached for the box on her lap and she gripped the lid. "I thought of maybe something we could do that is just us. Something that I do with no one else. Something that is only for us. Not a copy of something I do with someone else. No Rory or Dad or Luke. Something I do only with you."

Emily's breath held in her chest. It felt like her lungs seemed to freeze in place, like they had suddenly become encased in a balloon and she felt incapable of breathing out as the nervous anticipation of what Lorelai was about to suggest built exponentially. "What is your idea?" she finally managed to say, hoping that her voice sound calm and measured.

"Well," Lorelai lifted the lid of the shoebox slightly. "You have memories of things that I don't remember but I should. And I have memories of things that you didn't see but should have. I thought maybe we could have a Tell the tell moment and do a show and tell before each movie night."

"A show and tell?" Emily's brow creased in confusion. "I don't understand."

"Um… it is what it says on the tin." Lorelai finally lifted the shoe box lid away and set it to one side "We bring something to show the other and talk about it. A picture or a trinket that is or was important to us. So we are sharing our memories with each other and showing each other tha…" she trailed off and looked down at the box. "Filling in the gaps. Make things clearer… It doesn't have to be big things just little bits but things that means a lot. What…what do you think?" she swallowed nervously and looked up at Emily with expectant nervousness.

Emily swallowed, the balloon in her chest punctured and she could breathe normally. "It's a lovely idea." She cast her eyes down at the box on Lorelai's lap. "Did you bring something to show me?"

Lorelai nodded and slowly extended her arms out, holding the box out to Emily. Her actions were slow and cautious as if she was afraid to let it go. Emily carefully took the box and stared at the contents. A clump of glued wooden popsicle sticks covered in pink glitter.

"It is the first thing that Rory made for me. It's supposed to be a heart," Lorelai explained with a tinge of pride in her voice. "Miss Patty helped her make it. It was how we met Miss Patty properly. We went to one of the town's festivals and Rory was fascinated with the dancers. Miss Patty clocked our situation exactly the minute she saw us. Two days later this envelope arrived at the inn containing 'my winnings'. Six months of free dance classes that I 'won' in the raffle," she sighed softly as she remember the kindness the dance teacher had showed her. "One day I got held up and Miss Patty kept hold of Rory for me and they made this together." She smiled shyly. "I know it looks a mess but Rory was only three. She came toddling over to me this sticky glittery mess in her hand and fixed me with those big blue eyes, all solemn and serious. She wanted me to have something pretty." Lorelai gave a heavy sigh. "I know it looks like its rubbish but it's… I don't know I'm never going to be able to get rid of it."

"I understand," Emily looked down at the mess in the box again with a new found appreciation for its meaning. There were things that Lorelai had drawn and made as a young child for her and Richard tucked away about the house, many in tissue lined boxes in an attempt to preserve them. Richard still had a pen holder Lorelai had made out of a toilet roll inner when she was five sat in his desk drawer where he thought no one could see it. "Thank you for sharing this with me," she reverently handed the shoe box back to Lorelai.

"Do you think we could do this then?" Lorelai asked as she gently put the box on the table. She took a cookie and sat back nibbling it nervously.

"I do. It's a wonderful idea," Emily took one of the poured cups of coffee and sipped it silently. The liquid was tepid and the warmth helped calm her. She was still a bundle of nervousness. She felt like she needed to reciprocate but there too many things that she could think of that she wanted to show Lorelai. Wanted a chance to explain why she had reacted in ways that Lorelai disagreed with. Wanted to explain her insecurities and the boundaries of her world and how that had all contributed to the awful distance that had existed between them. Suddenly a thought struck her of something she could show Lorelai. "Oh, I know."

"Mom, you don't have to do it now," Lorelai reasoned. "I put you on the spot, do it for next time."

"No," Emily shook her head and placed the cup back on the tray. "Come with me." She rose from the couch and made her way towards the kitchen and the entrance to the basement.

"Oh Mom, you were in the middle of something," Lorelai called as she followed her mother through the dining room. "I didn't mean to interrupt."

"That's not important," Emily waved her hand dismissively towards the dining room as she descended into the basement. Flipping the light on, she crossed to one of the storage wardrobes. She quickly located the basket she wanted to show Lorelai. She moved to the counter beside the wrapping station and placed the small wicker sewing basket on the counter.

"My sewing basket!" Lorelai exclaimed with an air of excitement. It had been one of her favourite things as a child. One of the few times she actually remembered liking one of the presents her parents had showered her with. "I wondered where this got to."

Emily opened one of the lids of the wicker basket and pulled out a small red and white gingham fabric needle case. She held it out to Lorelai, "Do you remember this?"

Lorelai took the needle case and studied it. "Did I make it?"

"No, your Aunt Hope did." Emily took the fabric back and set it down on the counter. "Do you remember the trip to France to visit her when you were nine? You were miserable and pouty and so unruly." She looked up and studied Lorelai's face. It had hardened into one of upset. Emily patted her hand comfortingly. "You were bored, but I didn't see it. All these beautiful things to see and do. The Chateaus, the museums the galleries and ballets. I couldn't understand why you were being so petulant. But your Aunt Hope could. One day she sent your father and I out on our own. Hope sews. She was always the creative one out of the two of us. When we came back you were making a stitch sampler. Hope had spent the day teaching you how to sew. You spent the rest of the holiday sewing. At the end of the trip Hope gave you this." Emily nodded at the needle case. "I had never seen you more thrilled with a gift in your life." She swallowed nervously. "I was so jealous of Hope, that she had understood you more than I had. It was silly, I should have been grateful. I had my lovely little girl back."

"Dad bought me the sewing box, when he came back from his next business trip. I remember you were mad," Lorelai swallowed. "Everyone else thought it was good and ladylike that I wanted to sew, but you were…" Lorelai studied her mother for a moment. "You were jealous?" She smiled as Emily gave a sheepish nod.

"Unbelievably so. I was so angry at Hope that she had managed to awaken something that you loved within you when everything that I tried to teach or show you; piano, dance, seemed to turn you off and create a battle. I was silly and somewhat pathetic," Emily admitted. "For Christmas that year you sewed a whole little nativity set for me. We have it upstairs with the decorations. I have many of the things that you made, those that haven't disintegrated. I understand completely about what you mean about never wanting to get rid of them." She took a deep breath. "I think the chance to be able to show and speak about these things is a wonderful idea Lorelai. I think that I have a lot of things that I need to explain to you. The chance to be able to show you what I should have told you then, it's probably more of a chance then I deserve. I have a mountain of preserved memories tucked inside this house. I would love to be able to share them with you," she gave Lorelai a nervous smile. "Thank you for suggesting it."

Lorelai inhaled sharply as she took in her mother's hopeful pleased expression. It was moments like this that always made her resent the fact that she and her mother didn't or at least hadn't got on. She knew the reason that both of them were so similar and so insecure over everything that had happened that they hid behind humour, snarks and barbs. Moments like this just hurt because of the opportunities lost. She liked that her mother was being sincere, was thrilled that Emily was accepting what she had suggested but she couldn't help but feel like her mother had misunderstood her true purpose. She wanted to know all the moments that Emily had of her that she had no memory where they had been close and loving with each other not have her mother explain where things had gone wrong.

"Mom," Lorelai gently took Emily's hand. "I don't want this to be some kind of mea culpa for either of us. We just… We've both said and done things and will probably continue to do or say things that neither of us likes. We have to try and I dunno… I mean I know both of us could carry a grudge up Everest and hold it longer then Methuselah. But this isn't about that." She stroked her thumb over the back of Emily's hand. "This show and tell is not about explaining why we were distant from each other or jealous or whatever. I don't want it to be about that, about us casting blame. We've done that too many times. I don't want us to have to justify ourselves to each other. I want it to be us sharing the little things. Because the little things add up to a lot. Am I making sense? Do you understand?"

Emily swallowed, she had misunderstood; she was wrecking _their thing_ before it had even begun. The balloon encased her chest once more and she found it difficult to exhale. Lorelai squeezed her hand reassuringly. She smiled. "I understand." Her voice sounded soft and fragile.

Lorelai shifted awkwardly and then smiled widely. "Can I have the sewing box?" Lorelai asked looking at the small wicker basket. "I mean I know it's mine, but can I take it with?"

Emily blinked in surprise at the sudden shift in topic, the balloon within her chest deflated. "Yes," she nodded and turned to face her daughter. "Lorelai. Thank you for coming today."

"I had to Mom," Lorelai smiled weakly as she packed the needle case in the sewing basket. "I wanted us to have something that was just us. Once I had the idea I didn't want to forget it. I'm a bit all over the place at the minute. I'm Little Miss Scatter Brain right now," her smile gathered strength. "Coffee?"

"Coffee," Emily nodded in agreement. "I'll freshen the pot on the other will be going cold."

"I don't mind," Lorelai shrugged and made her way up the steps. "Coffee is coffee. Those cookies are good though. I'll grab some of those."

"You really should watch your diet more," Emily scolded lightly as she followed Lorelai up the stairs. "You'll see now that your over 40 it suddenly gets harder," she rolled her eyes. "One day that miraculous metabolism you are blessed with will just switch off and then it's salads for lunch every day."

"Mom!" Lorelai exhaled with dramatic playfulness, her hand coming to her chest in mock horror. "Don't try to scare me with the s word."

"I mean it in all seriousness," Emily closed the door behind her and moved to the coffee maker.

"Scaring me with salads," Lorelai childishly muttered, she playfully poked Emily's arm.

"Honestly Lorelai," Emily shook her head, the smile on her face belying the fact that she was supposedly annoyed. She chuckled. Her smile widened as Lorelai gave her a playful smile.

"Well my metabolism is still miraculous so I'm gonna eat them," Lorelai took several of the cookies and put them on a plate. "Are we going back into the living room?"

"Yes," Emily nodded, she smiled as Lorelai pivoted and watched her daughter trot out of the kitchen. She felt like she was lighter than air. She had once asked Lorelai why their relationship wasn't the same as Lorelai's and Rory's. She had so wanted to be close to her daughter, to share things with her daughter. Finally she had what she wanted. She had a relationship with her daughter. She was sharing things with Lorelai, they were opening up to each other. It had only taken a 30 year detour but they were finally at a point where they could talk once more without angering each other. They could have conversations without biting and snapping at each other; and these conversations were now meaningful ones. They were not just a mother and her little girl babbling about dollies and fairy tales no matter how much those times had meant to her. They were proper and meaningful.

Emily almost floated to the couch in the living room and set the two fresh cups on the tray. She sat down, as Lorelai moved forward to grab her coffee. When Lorelai sat back she was closer then Emily had anticipated. Neither of them flinched, neither of them moved. They had a new standard for appropriate space and distance. They had a new normal. This last year had brought them further then she had ever thought possible. She smiled at her daughter and her daughter smiled back, the expression full of genuine warmth. This new phase of their relationship was going to be the best ever she was certain.

She glanced over at her daughter as Lorelai bit into one of the cookies, spilling crumbs down her top which she promptly brushed onto the carpet. The protesting "Lorelai!" slipped from her lips before she could stop herself. Emily rolled her eyes, they may be moving forward in some respects but some things would never change.


End file.
